tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-81393282024-03-07T17:38:20.740-05:00PERGE MODO
"Perge modo et qua te ducit via dirige gressum," said Venus to Aeneas.Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.comBlogger1190125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-58270010566595104032018-07-24T12:00:00.000-04:002018-07-24T12:28:31.433-04:00My Ocean<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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Where it rolls is left behind</div>
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Over sand wash working nights</div>
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High above the book from fingers slips to floor</div>
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Wake lean over get it back</div>
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See the dirt a bug a license lost</div>
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<!--EndFragment-->Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-45536755985163679132018-07-24T09:47:00.001-04:002018-07-24T10:10:29.742-04:00The Last Of The Red Hot Squirrels<br />
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“Oh my God, Mr. Tony, what are you doing?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Nick opened the gate and walked into the garden just as I was putting down the Havahart trap containing one very upset squirrel.<o:p></o:p></div>
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This has been the summer of the Great Squirrel War of 2018. Overrun with them, our diplomatic contract granting them a sizable percentage of my produce had been broken. They were now eating everything, and making the neighbor’s cat dizzy with their constant circular frolic along the top of the garden fence. </div>
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“I’m getting rid of the squirrels, Nick. There are too many, and they are eating everything.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Nick looked up from the straw of his juice box and reconsidered offering the captive critter some snack from a mylar bag. The <i>little</i> Nick whom I met five years ago is now the <i>not-so-little</i> Nick who is taller than all of us, and sporting wispy first growth facial hair. His head is styled to the moment, cross cut above the ears and parted sideways all the way around with the thick growth above the bowled furrow gathered into a Seussicalular top knot. Kids and their stylings. I suppose we all did that, wanting to fit in, and then years later laughing at photos of our emotional attempt to look like our favorite Beatle. <o:p></o:p></div>
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“What are you going to do with him?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“I’m giving him to Sophie Tucker, so he can be with the 31 I’ve already caught and gotten rid of.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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31! Really? That many?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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<span style="font-family: "cambria"; font-size: 18pt;">“Yes, and aren’t you going to ask me who Sophie Tucker is?”</span><br />
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Over the past five years, since Chris and I moved here and became his neighbors, Nick has learned that any conversation with me will entail references and words at best cryptic or at worst indecipherable even upon explanation. His over-glazing sometimes keeps him from even asking a single question that might involve strenuous mental attentiveness. Now, I can almost see him weighing the entertainment factor of the answer to his question against the effort needed to ask it. Sometimes, he will play along, other times, he will simply retreat into his mind and into the pleasant experience of being with a man who is to him a weird foreign country made familiar. He deploys his faux tired voice.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Okay. Who is Sophie Tucker?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“What kind of schooling produces a fledgling high schooler who does not know who Sophie Tucker is? That’s what I want to know. No, it’s not even a question. Important stuff is never taught in school. For instance, have you been taught which fork to start with when you are seated at dinner at the French embassy next to Pamela Harriman? And that’s Pamela Digby Churchill Hayward Harriman, in-ci-den-ta-ly. A woman with so many skeletons in her closet, you wouldn’t even need to choose a fork for the escargot; just a pry a wishbone out of her. She was full of wishbones, that one. Where were we?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Sophie Tucker.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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I always know that despite my rambling, Nick will keep up. He must sense some value in this, and because he does this, I have a better feeling about his future.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Right! You know she grew up not far from us. We could actually walk to the house she grew up in. And she’s buried up at the end of Jordan Lane in the Jewish cemetery. That is where squirrel #32 is going.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“You’re gonna bury him in a Jewish cemetery?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“No, Nick. Squirrel 32 looks a bit too goy for that.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Hunh?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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I weigh the merits of introducing Nick to some entry-level Yiddish, and set it aside.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Sophie Tucker was called ‘The Last of the Red Hot Mamas’ and don’t ask me who the ones were who came before her because, honestly, she is the only red hot mama I’ve ever heard of, so let’s just assume there is a lineage and that she was the caboose, a word that sure sounds Yiddish, but actually isn’t.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Hunh?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“She grew up in Hartford. In the South End. She got married and she worked in a greasy spoon on Fishfry Street. Can you imagine?” <o:p></o:p></div>
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I paused to look at Nick and realized that I’d have to pause more frequently to unpack some items that I take for granted.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“A ‘greasy spoon,’ Nick, is what you call a low class and cheap restaurant where you can’t be sure of the sanitary status of the utensils, okay?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Right. I knew that.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Good. So she was working there and going home to this husband and a baby, and all the while dreaming of being a Vaudeville singer instead of slinging hash, and really, who could blame her? I think of her as a zaftig chanteuse version of Myrtle Wilson in Gatsby.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Again, a pause to check Nick’s face for exasperation. I don’t think he is listening any more. He is fixed on the very terrified squirrel gnawing at the metal ribs of the cage and desperate to be free.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“I think Sophie was just like that squirrel. She felt trapped and doomed and she couldn’t take it. She was like Maggie the cat on that hot tin roof.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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(I didn’t even bother looking at Nick to see how that might have registered before I continued.)<o:p></o:p></div>
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“So one day, she up and left. She took off her apron, and just like Kathy Mattea she knew that Forth Worth couldn’t hold her because her dreams were bigger than the Texas sky. Only instead of Boulder, she got a one-way ticket to New York City and that is where she became a ‘Red Hot Mama.’ And now she is dead. And back home in this mashugana place. And buried up on that hill not so far from where she grew up, and I am not sure what that teaches us. They say you can never go home again, but really, you can never get away from home is the better lesson, I think. That is why the insolent Veda told her mother Mildred Pierce that no matter how many restaurants she opened, she would never get that chicken grease off her hands, and she was right. She was right, Nick. She was so right. She just shouldn’t have said it. Just because you are right about something doesn’t mean you should say it. I wonder what Sophie’s descendants would say. I’m sure they still live nearby. If we walk by that house, I bet we can hear them in there playing her records and singing along with her on <a href="https://youtu.be/3heCSPJrO70" target="_blank">“Some Of These Days.”</a> <o:p></o:p></div>
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“I got in trouble at school yesterday because I said something, and I was right, but I still got in trouble. I mean serious trouble.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Oh? What did you say?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“This girl was being mean to me. She does it all the time, and she gets away with it. She says anything she wants to me. She calls me anything she wants.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“What did you say, Nick?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“So she’s all in my face and pushing me and everyone is laughing.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Nick. What did you say?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“She told a teacher that I called her the N-word.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Oy. Did you?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Well she says it all the time. And all her friends say it.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Oh. Let me guess. She’s black?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Yes.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Oh, Nick. Well, this is a big lesson for you. Black people can use the N-word any time they want. It is theirs to use and it is never ours to use. And it doesn’t matter if it’s fair or not. It is just how it is. I’ll tell you how I learned this. I used to use the word ‘Trannie.’ Same deal. All my trans friends used it, so I figured I could use it or write it. They got pissed. I got schooled. They can use it. I can’t. Same thing with the N-word. So what happened?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Nick didn’t want to talk about it anymore. (He also didn’t even blink at my use of the word “trans” which damn surely is a sign of the mainstreamed sexual times in which we live. In my day, trans would have meant only Siberian railway.) Instead of listening, Nick was trying to push a potato chip through the bars of the cage. He said, “I think he’s hungry. Maybe we should name this one Sophie Tucker.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“No. No names. Only numbers. If I start giving them names, I’ll start thinking how cute they are and then I’ll stop catching them and then they will go back to eating everything. There are lots of woods up there on the far side of the cemetery. Plenty for him to eat, and at least 31 other squirrels for him to play with. And, the dead don’t care if you eat their flowers. I’m just worried that it may not be far enough away. I don’t know if squirrels are like dogs that always know how to find their way home even if they are many miles away. For all I know, I may be trapping the same squirrel over and over again!”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Can I come with you? Are you going to bring him there now?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“No.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Not only is Nick not allowed in my house, he is also not allowed in my car. We don’t need the neighbors seeing us harboring an underage boy. The garden is as far as Nick is allowed, and that was permitted only after a frank discussion with his wise father five years ago.<o:p></o:p></div>
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In case you haven’t yet surmised it, Nick is the “son” that an older gay man like me may get in his life should the circumstances allow it. To be sure, he is not the “son” Chris and I would have chosen or created. Ours would have been a brilliant modern dancer, an Olympic gymnast, star of a remake of “Lassie Come Home,” or Tadzio in a remake of “Death in Venice,” a stunning prodigy mathematician/pianist, a precocious boy Youtube star who ate Mozart for breakfast and was able to pay off his fathers’ mortgage and move them to Beverly Hills, before dropping dead of exhaustion before turning fifteen. That would have been our son. That is probably why gay men are better as the ‘gay couple next door’ rather than as actual parents, but don’t quote me on that because I have gay friends who are raising kids.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I looked at the squirrel. So innocent and with heart racing. So unprepared for everything that was happening to him. My primary consolation was that they don’t have memories like mine or Nick’s. Should he escape, he’d scamper home, but tomorrow he’d be back grabbing at the sunflower seed/peanut butter schmeer inside the same trap. <o:p></o:p></div>
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And then, I was a million miles away in time, but only a few feet from where I had been a kid just like Nick, for this was in fact the street I grew up on. I didn’t seek this street out when Chris and I were looking for our next house. It just happened to be exactly what we wanted. We moved in, I took down all the trees and created the walled garden I saw in my dreams. Sometimes, at the end of the day, I sit down and scrape the wonderful black dirt of this garden from beneath my fingernails and think about the perfectly yet curiously homebound cycle of life; of even an adventurous and far flung life like mine.<o:p></o:p></div>
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When I grew up on this street, it was a dirt road, and I couldn’t stand it. I wished for wings, not to see the world but just to rise up and get away. No word had more beauty for me than “away.” All creation was divided into two. There was where and what I was, and there was “away.” I would look at my parents and my younger brothers and all my neighborhood friends and their parents, and I knew instinctively that they held no dreams of “away.” I was different from them. I was the “away’ child. I was that dandelion seed that screams to be lifted and blown far by some Sirocco that finally carries it over the high fence into a place you’ve never heard about but love instantly upon arrival. I was that dandelion seed whose heart broke while watching “The Wizard of Oz,” and who wanted to shout at the TV screen, “You don’t need to go back there! Kansas is nothing! Wake up, girl! You have everything I want! Stay there! What is your problem?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Sophie Tucker felt “away.” The urge was strong enough to make her leave husband and child. Any local jury would have condemned her, but not I because I know what it feels like to be desperate inside your heart. To wake up at the age of 25 and to say, “What have I gotten myself into?” Unlike Sophie, I wasn’t exactly slinging hash. I had indeed gotten far away from this street, but in the process, I had gotten myself into another trap with albeit fancier trappings. That is another story, but I was like a horribly misplaced orchid trying to squirm though a crack in a concrete sidewalk, elbowing for enough air and water to live for another day, to collect my thoughts, and finally, to get again “away.” My problems, like Sophie’s were not that big. It was our desire that was big, our unfounded need for so much more than we had been handed; our sense of injustice at our lot in life; our belief that good wasn’t enough when there was gorgeous right around the corner. Say what you will about our abandoning of our lives, we really had no choice but to follow our instincts. This will strain the comparison, but you might say that I traded “Mother Church” for "My Yiddishe Momme" and I never looked back with one ounce of regret. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Nick had wandered away. Perhaps he had heard his mother calling for him. She seems to have a sense of how long he spends in my garden. Worried that he is annoying me, she will call him home after a spell even though I have assured her that he is never a problem.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Nick is not an “away” child. He is already home, and not destined for reinvention or transformation. He doesn’t want or need wings. There’s no leather bound suitcase under his bed begging to be packed at midnight for a furtive run to the bus station, to Broadway, to the constant stepping down a notch on the playbills of your private Vaudeville circuit and that final return to the street you grew up on, rationalizing your disillusionment and valiantly making a pretty quilt of the scraps you daily bring forth from that suitcase, still under your bed, still willing to take you away again, should you still be willing to go away again. You silently swear to your garden you’ve still got it in you. But Nick? He’ll have just the learning that comes from making little mistakes between snacks provided by loving and careful parents.<o:p></o:p></div>
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It’s just you and me now, Squirrel #31. His tail is whipping. His eyes are wide. His sharp claws are braced against the cage. I can’t begin to imagine his panic. Or maybe I can. <o:p></o:p></div>
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I haven’t the heart for triumph today. I know I’ll regret it, but for once in my life, I’m going to choose the less courageous, less pioneering, less star-stuck, less dramatic, less decisive, less dazzling, less original path. No musical showstoppers will be written about what I am about to do, but I open the trap and step back to watch Sophie make a run for it, home again before dark.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-5154872684343004392017-11-13T19:52:00.002-05:002017-11-13T20:03:14.436-05:00Robert Sorrell - Jeweler To The Imperial Court!<span style="font-size: large;">Have you ever wondered where those queens get their gorgeous bling? I loved meeting and interviewing Robert Sorrell. I hope you'll enjoy reading his story. He is a native New Yorker and 100% pure NYC Gay. </span><span style="color: red; font-size: large;"><a href="http://southfloridagaynews.com/Celebrity/robert-sorrell-jeweler-of-the-imperial-court.html"><b><i>Out today on SFGN.</i></b></a></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyPLoEPxaZg1o01KqfyqTyMl4_EoavwSRuykRCxAnkj2RwEd9E35rjTKNvNjDCWlWxkEHRXDHq39zOLxEqNbLgE7kwBwJiYm0-61tfi8_cZX5VgBxNTb4sxpwsRfPjDuUpghFK/s1600/RSorrell.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjyPLoEPxaZg1o01KqfyqTyMl4_EoavwSRuykRCxAnkj2RwEd9E35rjTKNvNjDCWlWxkEHRXDHq39zOLxEqNbLgE7kwBwJiYm0-61tfi8_cZX5VgBxNTb4sxpwsRfPjDuUpghFK/s640/RSorrell.jpg" width="640" /></a></span>Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-58224928019321488332017-02-10T12:42:00.000-05:002017-02-10T12:42:16.745-05:00Studying Steve Bannon<div class="_1dwg _1w_m _2ph_" style="color: #1d2129; font-family: 'San Francisco', -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, '.SFNSText-Regular', sans-serif; font-size: 12px; letter-spacing: -0.23999999463558197px; padding: 12px 12px 0px;">
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Because your life is in his hands, you ought to be studying Steve Bannon.</div>
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Never once having read Breitbart, I have been doing my homework about Bannon, concentrating on what he has said and written that is most widely disseminated.</div>
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I think he is right about the threat of radical Islamic extremists who want us dead. I think his adulation over the Judeo-Christian tradition is short-sighted. His adherence to nationalism over globalism is short-sighted. His praise for traditionalism is rooted in fear over some unspecified future change. </div>
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Religion, nationalism and traditionalism are the pillars supporting his backyard and the fence around it, but he either ignores or doesn't like the fact that his home was <i>other</i> long before it was <i>his</i>. In fact, his world has been <i>other</i> many times over before it was <i>his</i>. Bannon's backyard was nothingness and timelessness, and then it was water or fire and stone, and then the province of plants and animals and naked people whose actions would shock a traditionalist in a time machine. His yard was owned by other nations speaking other languages and with other gods. The stubborn lines drawn by his philosophy are the ones he learned in maybe third grade. </div>
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In a nutshell, Bannon is someone who has seen roaches in his kitchen and wants to exterminate them. Great, but what he forgets is that if my neighbor in the apartment down the hall has roaches, I have them. What he forgets is that roaches mutate. There will always be some form of roach in his kitchen making him swing a club just like the naked caveman who used to squat in his backyard. The better route would be to genetically modify the roach to make it not a pest. Apply that strategy to his philosophy and you get internationalism, intermarriage, globalism and harmless/non-aggressive religion. (Everything he currently hates.) </div>
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Knowing this about him, everything falls into place. In 2014, Bannon said this about Putin, "I’m not justifying Vladimir Putin and the kleptocracy that he represents, because he eventually is the state capitalist of kleptocracy. However, we the Judeo-Christian West really have to look at what he’s talking about as far as traditionalism goes — particularly the sense of where it supports the underpinnings of nationalism — and I happen to think that the individual sovereignty of a country is a good thing and a strong thing. I think strong countries and strong nationalist movements in countries make strong neighbors, and that is really the building blocks that built Western Europe and the United States, and I think it’s what can see us forward.</div>
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You know, Putin’s been quite an interesting character. He’s also very, very, very intelligent. I can see this in the United States where he’s playing very strongly to social conservatives about his message about more traditional values, so I think it’s something that we have to be very much on guard of."</div>
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A visit to a good optometrist might help Bannon and might help save our lives and those of our children.</div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-27999934667798102402016-12-08T13:51:00.001-05:002016-12-08T13:51:24.671-05:00My book ENDING ANITA has been published!I'm please to announce that my book <i><b>ENDING ANITA - How Two Key West Bartenders Won Gay Marriage For Florida</b></i> has been published and is available on <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Ending-Anita-Bartenders-Marriage-Equality/dp/0692741887/">Amazon</a>.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOCparqdtRwbnNr9kvr3AONgMqdq0M-LqNqOVhw5b3g-Qo0Y_m2NBetlx0s_gG482PoaAwROPOiNKeUwHztfwvjYkWXMZkCH1155rkq6ZMfk-xxpjXjSLxUINBHb07-GtFUdAj/s1600/frontcover.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjOCparqdtRwbnNr9kvr3AONgMqdq0M-LqNqOVhw5b3g-Qo0Y_m2NBetlx0s_gG482PoaAwROPOiNKeUwHztfwvjYkWXMZkCH1155rkq6ZMfk-xxpjXjSLxUINBHb07-GtFUdAj/s640/frontcover.jpg" width="426" /></a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnOX4nx3OLdKyF54F5w1K245CvMWc-KuwFKwNoM6lbOXrpBmo-MESwsz0B6z2RnDMN3DI-Ajj3t2PLuyjlmtkZd22VMfhsAy1_1FNjXI-racCIp7JtTt4sEOhjXOXr6Bwt00oD/s1600/backCoverminusBarcode.jpg" imageanchor="1"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnOX4nx3OLdKyF54F5w1K245CvMWc-KuwFKwNoM6lbOXrpBmo-MESwsz0B6z2RnDMN3DI-Ajj3t2PLuyjlmtkZd22VMfhsAy1_1FNjXI-racCIp7JtTt4sEOhjXOXr6Bwt00oD/s640/backCoverminusBarcode.jpg" width="424" /></a>Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-39063790238349441282016-08-08T22:22:00.000-04:002016-08-09T15:56:45.450-04:00The Indeterminates<div class="MsoNormal">
First a deep breath. Spade and clippers in hand. Where to
start? This garden is overgrown. Away for just a week and look what happens!
Barely passable are the brick paths. Their underlying layers of weedblock are breeched.
Warning to those who want to “build a wall” to keep undesirables out,
dandelions without passports invade on parachutes and root in tiny fissures
between bricks. Neatly pruned tomatoes that had sworn to be bound to the
discipline of their stakes are thrashing about like bewitched wild things, and
their shoots detain me as I walk by.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhde6iacpCRgdHFgM15aJ8O52pOWlti-sO5OVnxGzf8qFNX55GU2f4D9z6xMAIzNMDIqHTkvfqOCI7XOWG-tVj_-ffjJHJRdrupcljvEqTdsmvUj3U5_f4LyfOw0e8IdpoL03z3/s1600/IMG_8223.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhde6iacpCRgdHFgM15aJ8O52pOWlti-sO5OVnxGzf8qFNX55GU2f4D9z6xMAIzNMDIqHTkvfqOCI7XOWG-tVj_-ffjJHJRdrupcljvEqTdsmvUj3U5_f4LyfOw0e8IdpoL03z3/s320/IMG_8223.jpg" width="320" /></a>Is overgrowth a decline in the arc of life or just the lush
fulfillment of youth? Is it the glorious spurt before the going to seed? I ask
only because not-so-little Nick is also now overgrown. He has been set upon by
hormones, and what had been a perfectly compact boy is now the somewhat
mystified and confused owner of a body stretching and fomenting. He came into
the garden to see what I was doing. <o:p></o:p></div>
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“I’m bringing this wild place under control is what I am
doing, Nick. Look at how we can barely walk the paths without having our ankles
strangled by the rampaging nasturtium. And that Clary sage with its purple
spikes loaded with bees is like a raft bound for political asylum. Or like a
roadblock in Kabul. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And the encroaching
portulaca clumps need a good haircut, don’t they!<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>And look at that caryopteris. Trying to walk
around that thing could cause scoliosis. What is that on your arm?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“I broke it. I was on my bike and I crashed. You have to
sign it.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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His cast was wrapped in bright red medical adhesive. (In my
day, a cast was white plaster and the tape was fleshtone.) As he handed me a
Sharpie, he explained that he had flown over the handlebars and walked home
with his forearm at an odd angle. Most vexing for him is the doctor’s order
that he not go swimming for six weeks. He’ll probably always remember this as
the summer when he couldn’t swim or do fun stuff.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Well I suppose this gets you out of that summer school
thing your grandfather arranged for you?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“No,” he said with some irritation. His grandfather, a chef,
had paid for him to go to a cooking school, with an eye to passing down to Nick
his profession. Nick wasn’t having it. ‘They said that even if I can’t chop
stuff, I can still do everything else.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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I tried to imagine carving a radish into a swan using only
my left hand and a ginzu knife.<o:p></o:p></div>
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We never do what our fathers or grandfathers want us to do,
do we? My father wanted me to be happy under the hood of a sports car. He
brought home wonderful cars for me, including a Triumph Herald. None of them
ran, and I was not going to learn how to make them run. Although Nick would
have empathized, I kept this business to myself. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Instead, I said, “When I grew up in this neighborhood, we
didn’t have a community swimming pool. We made do with a brackish pond on the
other side of town. Rather than swim, I played ball. Everyday, I dragged my bat
and glove down to the playground where I always got picked last and played
right field where nothing ever happened. It was actually very meditative.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwPNpnKrPSjz8i586uHzKpjLu4cckBDRoOP2n08_6CFH0hrMPa8FT5TTVMi68LYGKERqIv1PDYKgtaT1r4grg0VXnop93VNPEt6kDAlwYNqdNlfUSLmbVvLQCi6nc_02B6isse/s1600/IMG_8221.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwPNpnKrPSjz8i586uHzKpjLu4cckBDRoOP2n08_6CFH0hrMPa8FT5TTVMi68LYGKERqIv1PDYKgtaT1r4grg0VXnop93VNPEt6kDAlwYNqdNlfUSLmbVvLQCi6nc_02B6isse/s320/IMG_8221.jpg" width="240" /></a>It’s funny how clearly I remember it. Standing alone in deep
right field with my Don Drysdale glove hanging limp by my side. The smell of
the grass. The smell of the glove. A garden snake with an errand passes my
shoes with no curiosity. The voices of all the other boys would become so far
away, and in my head I was very very far away. I was in Hollywood. Fabian
himself had come from California. He was telling me to get in his car, and he was taking me straight to Hollywood. I knew that Hollywood was where I would grow
into whatever it was I was meant to be. In Hollywood, no one had to fix a car. That
is about as far as my daydream would go. I’d play it over and over again until
I’d drag my bat and ball home for lunch. I wasn’t happy.<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Nick, I hated baseball. I only did it because that’s all we
had. Except for Wednesday afternoons at 1:30 when we had Arts-and-Crafts. I
made ashtrays or eagles out of plaster-of-Paris – which, incidentally is what a
cast for a broken limb was made of in my day, with a dish towel for a sling.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“So what you’re saying is you were a weird kid.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Yes. I wasn’t happy being weird then, but I am now. Just
like you are not happy about your summer school or your arm or much anything
these days, but someday, if you’re lucky, you will be happy and you’ll cherish
all those things that will have gotten you there. The question is, what’s it
going to be with you? Will you become a chef like your grandfather?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“No.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Don’t say no. Say ‘Who knows?’ because you don’t know.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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It used to be so much easier to pontificate like this when
Nick was shorter than me. Also, I am hardly one to talk to this kid about
planning one’s future. I have never planned a single thing that has happened to
me. When I was exactly his age, I had a best friend, Jay McGowan. We were outcasts,
two matching loners. On a good day at recess, we played double-dutch with the
black girls. One day, Jay announced that he was going to visit the seminary
because they were having an open house, and did I want to come. I did not know
what a seminary was, but of course I agreed. We both came from pious Catholic
families but my parents would never have dreamed that their kid would consider
the priesthood. Jay’s parents, however, were the kind of first-generation Irish
American Catholics who wanted to offer their firstborn son to the Church. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I fell in love with the seminary the instant I saw it.
Silvery granite Gothic with a tower that could be seen for miles. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It was like Downton Abbey for the Holy Family.
Every seminarian had his own room! (At home, I shared a bedroom with my brother.) They put on a musical show for us, and said that they put on plays and concerts
and variety shows all year long. A very handsome seminarian played the guitar
and sang a Harry Belafonte tune, “Oh I’m sad to say, I’m on my way, I won’t be
back for many a day, my heart is heavy and my head is down, I had to leave a
little girl in Kingston town.” Okay, I thought, he's trying to let us know via a song lyric that we will have to give up girls if we enter the seminary. No problem. And from what I could see as I watched the seminarians charged with charming us, it wasn't a problem for any of them. I was a fourteen year-old cherub who knew the score. Jesus take the wheel, and no girls in the back seat! <o:p></o:p><br />
<br />
I scanned the many acres of the lush green campus. I saw playing fields, tennis courts and a gymnasium in the distance but no one said anything about baseball! It wasn’t required! It wasn't even encouraged! I knew in my heart this wouldn't be Hollywood, but it would be an easy slide into second base until I could steal home.</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Before saying goodbye, they brought forth a gigantic<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>round silver tray supporting a mountain of
Oreo cookies. Have all you want, they said! This sealed the deal for me.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
How could I have never heard of this place, I thought!<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
That evening, still humming “I’m sad to say I’m on my way,”
at dinner, I announced to my parents that I was going into the seminary. I
don’t think I was fully aware that this meant I intended to become a priest,
but that is certainly how my parents read it. My mother cried with joy. My
father frowned at his plate, confused but compliant. A few months later, I left
home, and that December, my parents came to the seminary for the annual
Christmas concert and heard their son do a solo, Maria’s introduction to “Do Re Mi” from the Sound of Music.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> "Let's start at the very beginning," I sang out to a full house. </span>When my
choirboy soprano voice ran up that scale and walloped that top note, the
auditorium burst into applause, and the bishop beamed at me from his front row
seat. I thought, “So this is what it means to have a priestly vocation, to be
the youngest of 650 men ages 14-24, all pressed together spiritually in an
all-male community forbidden to venture beyond the property edges.” That year,
I had my first cigarette, my first drink, and in the library I looked up the
word homosexual. I eventually quit smoking….</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nick followed me about sullenly while I yanked out encroaching
clumps of armeria, and drifts of creeping phlox. As always, he had come into
the garden because I talk to him as if he were an adult. No one else does that.
Today, I had not yet told him anything helpful or even odd enough to take home
and think about before falling asleep. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Nick, see that tomato plant? That one is named <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Roma</i>. It gets to a certain height and it
stops growing. It flowers all at once and it makes all of its tomatoes at once.
That kind of tomato is called ‘determinate.” See this one here? This is a
SuperSweet 100. This one will keep on growing and flowering and making tomatoes
until the first strong frost in autumn kills it. That kind is called
‘indeterminate.’<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>The determinates seem
to have a specific plan. They follow their plan, and that is it with them. Very
predictable. The indeterminates however run like crazy until they just can’t
run any more because the world turns cold. People are the same way. Some are
like the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Roma</i>. They do what they're told. They have a plan and they follow it. They are the kind that read the IKEA
manual before they assemble the furniture. I guess it makes them happy. I don’t
know. I was never a determinate. Then there are people like me, like the
indeterminate Supersweets. So full of desire to see and do everything that the
only thing that can stop us is death itself, but until that happens we want to
go everywhere and see everything and taste everything. We never get enough. We
want more Oreos!”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Hunh? Oreos?” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I had forgotten that my reminiscence about my introduction
to the seminary had happened silently inside my head.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Here’s the thing. I think you may be either a lazy
indeterminate or a discontent determinate. The jury is out on you, Nick, but
whatever you turn out to be, don’t be afraid of anything.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgikpaR3NVRBqVyGoDxOUhfY5ABFElsTt2Bzad9DNqQzq5VZfI2n-v4HXOOn7P0rA5SF70oLDMUA98QW5k7VeKYNUCnH94PDppiQIqsaCdxbwn6E3nyKwz0CqDOQAwcF1-W0MR_/s1600/IMG_8222.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgikpaR3NVRBqVyGoDxOUhfY5ABFElsTt2Bzad9DNqQzq5VZfI2n-v4HXOOn7P0rA5SF70oLDMUA98QW5k7VeKYNUCnH94PDppiQIqsaCdxbwn6E3nyKwz0CqDOQAwcF1-W0MR_/s320/IMG_8222.jpg" width="320" /></a>“I’m not afraid of anything.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"Well good. That’s half the battle. Now go home and make a
list of ten things you might like to be in this world. And no, Jackie Chan [Nick’s current hero] is not allowed on that list. I also don’t want to see
‘astronaut’ on that list. Okay?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Whatever.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“And give your mother these hot peppers. Or cook them
yourself, Mr. Summer School chef.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Whatever.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I watch him leave the garden, slower than when he was
younger and used to jump about like a squirrel. Soon he will be so engulfed
with adolescence that he won’t have the inclination to visit. His time in my
garden will become something he will think of ruefully among all the goods of
childhood that we give away. I will become uncool. Maybe even “strange” or
“weird” in his new cosmology. Years may pass before he will like me anew. I
hope the world he is entering will be kind to him. I hope he will be lucky, as
was I. I am suddenly Professor Marvel wondering if Dorothy will make it home
okay.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Turning back to the task of ordering my own raging universe,
where overgrowth cannot be stopped, the song that took me away from my
childhood repeats itself in my head. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’m sad to say, he’s on his way. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He won’t be back for many a day.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-89110674330255795482016-06-22T13:49:00.000-04:002016-06-22T13:49:28.184-04:00For This I Live<span style="background-color: white; color: #4b4f56; font-family: "san francisco" , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , ".sfnstext-regular" , sans-serif; letter-spacing: -0.2800000011920929px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;">All seven varieties of basil in my garden have leafed out beautifully in response to the regular heat of the new summer, but knowing what is to come - the dreaded and inevitable black mildew - I am wasting no time. </span></span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #4b4f56; font-family: "san francisco" , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , ".sfnstext-regular" , sans-serif; letter-spacing: -0.2800000011920929px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghwHXL2QapE9_54cR7O88jvFw57r-UYOVvkR-WlcljPxovNrlctyBRV6-ty_sPuarxYBzrha98PuXQeWI_pTTLx1ZCHfnRj04fb6wRHdVgMNcN2-NG0fKYcE8rIRIlsmqZ7FGL/s1600/IMG_8009.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghwHXL2QapE9_54cR7O88jvFw57r-UYOVvkR-WlcljPxovNrlctyBRV6-ty_sPuarxYBzrha98PuXQeWI_pTTLx1ZCHfnRj04fb6wRHdVgMNcN2-NG0fKYcE8rIRIlsmqZ7FGL/s320/IMG_8009.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></span></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #4b4f56; font-family: "san francisco" , , "blinkmacsystemfont" , ".sfnstext-regular" , sans-serif; letter-spacing: -0.2800000011920929px; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-size: large;">Today before sunrise (the oil in the leaves is strongest at this time) I took in a large bowl of it. I also clipped some parsely, sage, oregano, savory, arugula and thyme because, well, there it was, all green and leafy and ready to be mixed in with the basil to produce a unique pesto. Last week I dug up some young garlic. Fresh garlic has a mellow flavor (like a seminarian's neck.) It is difficult to peel because its skin isn't crispy, but if I can't give time to such a celestial ritual, what should I be doing? Our supermarket here in this less than chic suburb hasn't started the seasonal stocking of pine nuts, so I am using walnuts and no one would be the wiser If I hadn't said so. Cheaper, too. The olive oil is virgin but nothing too fancy. (It's not the violin, it's the bassoon.) <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCmYvgHHF1OLEEskGz5Dlb_1c6fUxDrtbc_18DeTfnK-BRci8s3ETNEDM2n-Gt3S0kTqfzhs7lt1y7f0zAn7DvV28Y8AeM6XqginxObO198vcajGoYtW154smfGflRwuUr-P39/s1600/IMG_8010.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCmYvgHHF1OLEEskGz5Dlb_1c6fUxDrtbc_18DeTfnK-BRci8s3ETNEDM2n-Gt3S0kTqfzhs7lt1y7f0zAn7DvV28Y8AeM6XqginxObO198vcajGoYtW154smfGflRwuUr-P39/s320/IMG_8010.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
I added two dried Carolina Reaper hot peppers from last season to the black peppercorns when I ground them up, being sure to use rubber gloves rather than risk ruining yet another pair of contact lenses. Never able to decide whether I prefer parmigiano or pecorino romano cheese, I throw in some of both. I can't tell you the relative measurements. I just keep adding things until I get the color, consistency and taste I like. The result is very thick and smooth, not like commercial pesto which is really just oil with some bits swirled in. I can always add more oil when it is decanted. I spoon the pesto into jars provided by my husband who buys a particularly precious and pricey yogurt called "White Moustache" (available at Cafe/Bar Boulud across from Lincoln Center) that comes in perfect jars for freezing pesto. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0b2WNXuafPs0N2FFvJIY-gV2rL8EXaUb4vBP9Rj2Q1Si2DgxV8rbQMVGp9lzEUp1oQhRgJxZ0OsE9efXj-uzSeoEQjlQNooacADeLKC2mwdAW-bk-tzw9dR43m9YpGEt3MfCm/s1600/IMG_8011.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0b2WNXuafPs0N2FFvJIY-gV2rL8EXaUb4vBP9Rj2Q1Si2DgxV8rbQMVGp9lzEUp1oQhRgJxZ0OsE9efXj-uzSeoEQjlQNooacADeLKC2mwdAW-bk-tzw9dR43m9YpGEt3MfCm/s320/IMG_8011.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
I filled seven of these, six of which went into the freezer, destined to make the trip south with me to Fort Lauderdale in November where I will taste my summer garden throughout the winter and inflict friends with them rather than arrive at their doors with the usual bottle of wine. I drizzle some olive oil on top of the pesto before putting on the lid. I don't know why I do this. Instinct, or maybe something I once saw my grandmother do. I think it seals and protects it. <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisyMMayxqbEoLNmXc27s8aJ9BeQzmB8nyCX1KG0X_uaXDcwQ4rSzd0ke7DA9kYiedo74KExpKmZAh6Gs0DyW7oWMvAFm98v6ZzhVzvAjXXcljWG5Irk9fURwFnovMlUHheUgyA/s1600/IMG_8012.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisyMMayxqbEoLNmXc27s8aJ9BeQzmB8nyCX1KG0X_uaXDcwQ4rSzd0ke7DA9kYiedo74KExpKmZAh6Gs0DyW7oWMvAFm98v6ZzhVzvAjXXcljWG5Irk9fURwFnovMlUHheUgyA/s320/IMG_8012.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
I'll be making several more batches, each one different, until the mildew shuts down the factory. For this I live. And now I am stationed in the full sun, like bright laundry on a clothesline, snappy and chattering with the neighbors, chiding the chipmunks and ready.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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</span></span>Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-80968188126554560082016-05-20T10:27:00.000-04:002016-05-20T10:27:46.052-04:00The Month Of DisMay<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfRSfV6BJ0kbsOeDMr_jT9f_YlYRtoBpl00aDSNCN5zbEMDKORzZ-1AaMcd_fhftyK5lT9renxli80UodYzl17JdWHmjHBS4MAsDPD5NNBXK6hRzNGmhYggcXCAojeXlMg_JEM/s1600/IMG_7410.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjfRSfV6BJ0kbsOeDMr_jT9f_YlYRtoBpl00aDSNCN5zbEMDKORzZ-1AaMcd_fhftyK5lT9renxli80UodYzl17JdWHmjHBS4MAsDPD5NNBXK6hRzNGmhYggcXCAojeXlMg_JEM/s320/IMG_7410.jpg" width="240" /></a>A cold May had my fingers numb as I pried bricks from a
section of path that had become a roller coaster. Some burrowing critter may
have tunneled during the winter below the path, causing the brick to sag. I removed them in
order, stacking them according to a system that would make their reassembly
fast and accurate. When Nick came running into the garden, I took a moment to
stand and return the demanded fist bump. Six months had passed since we had
spoken. For an eighth-grader that stretch can be a time of tumult with each day
burning something new into the circuitry of a young man. For me, it had been a
sojourn oddly saturnine in places despite the Fort Lauderdale sun. When he
asked me what I had done all winter, I could not think of anything. Is that
what it means to be relaxed, or had I been afloat in my head more than in the
ocean? I was glad to be back. Glad to be in the garden. Glad to have these
repairs to make. Glad to have lugged heavy bags of gravel to fill the sunken trenches
that had made the paths swoop beneath the bricks. Glad to know that I am not
superfluous in this place. Glad for the shock of the oddly cold month of May, a
month to be remembered as DisMay.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
Nick walked on the walls of the raised beds as if on a tight
rope and talked about the six months of winter that I had missed and that he
had spent at his new school. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I said, “So now you like Breakdown Academy? Remember how you
hated the idea of having to go there?” He rolled his eyes at the old joke and
opening his jacket, he pointed to the words embroidered into his shirt.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“It’s Break<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">THROUGH</i>.
And I like it a lot. But today I got a pink slip.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“You did? Well I’m certain an opportunity to wear it will
someday present itself to you.” This went swiftly over his head, probably for
the better.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I accidentally punched someone when we were playing.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“And what does the issuance of the pink slip get you?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Like detention. You have to sit in a room and do nothing.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“So it’s like Florida!” I added brightly. “That’s not so
bad.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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I poured the gravel into the ruts and used a rake to level
it before adding a new layer of weed blocking fabric. Nick changed the subject.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6s2ut7mVyE7_mLrdpgV9SIU2TsQGIwpnkpS-DZHlDuKTZg97HvSDTrms_7VcqeJkJlSIiHWJuA_4cBzG4KPoWRFFI3U1CQVTSbGDStx0bOZF3OFQxjwMiJ03YBUBocqwJpBOl/s1600/IMG_7412.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6s2ut7mVyE7_mLrdpgV9SIU2TsQGIwpnkpS-DZHlDuKTZg97HvSDTrms_7VcqeJkJlSIiHWJuA_4cBzG4KPoWRFFI3U1CQVTSbGDStx0bOZF3OFQxjwMiJ03YBUBocqwJpBOl/s320/IMG_7412.jpg" width="240" /></a>“My homeroom teacher brought his fiancé who’s a guy to
school.” <o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I didn’t look up from my work. So is this where we are going
now, I thought. Will this be the year when the gay thing will enter the conversation?
I had always known that sooner or later Nick would grow into the realization
that his neighbors are a gay couple. I think my going to Florida for half of
every year may have thrown him off track for a time because the ordinary
understanding of coupling precludes extended absences, but ready or not, I
would have to say the right things in response to any questions from him. I
hadn’t thought it through. I pretended this news was nothing.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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“Really? For show-and-tell?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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Again the eye-roll. “We don’t have show-and-tell in
eighth-grade. It was something where parents and teachers met and teachers
brought their husbands and wives.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
A plane flying overhead made distracting noise and it
reminded Nick about something. He said, “Oh! I asked my teacher about the
Lindbergh baby.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Last summer, we had a protracted discussion about the
kidnapping of the Lindbergh baby when I claimed it was buried beneath a rose
bush I was pruning.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“He told me that you weren’t making it up. Lindbergh was a
famous pilot.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Of course I wasn’t making it up. They called him ‘Lucky
Lindy.’ You ought to consider becoming a pilot. You’ll get to go places and
there’s good money to be made.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No, I’m going to do engineering.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“What on earth does that mean?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nick was ready for another subject-change. I can only guess
as to how ideas come to the forefront of the head of an eighth-grader.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“So the three people I admire most in the world are Jackie
Chan, Homer Simpson and Arnold Schwarzenegger.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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“You can’t be serious. What about Bette Midler?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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“Who?”<o:p></o:p></div>
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“Nevermind. You know Lindbergh was interested in engineering
when he was your age. First cars, then motorcycles and then airplanes. I think
aviation is what you should focus on.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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“I’m going to figure out time travel.”<o:p></o:p></div>
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I was now replacing the bricks and my back was beginning to
ache.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidncEwC45fZSn0vhyphenhyphen9I0BFi6DQ50qx__G-UpByLUOTWFvOEIfJGNshUlfv4V5aX2Q9lRf5y14_dbQlzaajzCWAdMOTQeyOF-y4ygFZnlKlhKBHbaOaTCjAXrv8hDiGILn25Pr_/s1600/IMG_7413.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidncEwC45fZSn0vhyphenhyphen9I0BFi6DQ50qx__G-UpByLUOTWFvOEIfJGNshUlfv4V5aX2Q9lRf5y14_dbQlzaajzCWAdMOTQeyOF-y4ygFZnlKlhKBHbaOaTCjAXrv8hDiGILn25Pr_/s320/IMG_7413.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Good. You can go back in time and help get the Lindbergh
baby back to his parents. You’ll be a hero and get a huge reward.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“How much?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I don’t remember the amount, but now that I think of it, if
you brought those dollars back with you into the present, you’d be
short-changed. Better to get the reward in diamonds.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
"What if I got the cash but put it into a bank <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">before</i> I came back to the present?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Not a good idea. Banks were failing in those days, and
besides, even if you picked one that survived the Depression, they wouldn’t
hold your account open for that many years, and how would you be able to
convince a bank teller that you had opened the account 90 years ago? No, get
diamonds.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What followed was a surprisingly astute speculation on the
part of Nick as to what holds its value better in the long run, cash or
diamonds. Maybe he ought to consider a career in finance.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I’ve got it, Nick. Here’s what you do. You take the reward
in cash and deposit it in a bank that will survive. Something like J.P. Morgan
or Wells Fargo. Mrs. Lindbergh’s father was a partner in J.P. Morgan so she can
help you with this. When you set up the savings account, you have the teller
take your fingerprints. You tell the bank that no one can access the account
unless their fingerprints match, and that the account must be kept in
perpetuity, accruing interest at the agreed upon rate. That way, when you get
back to the present, you simply walk into the bank, wave your hands, slap your palms down onto the blotter, leave your prints and get
your cash!”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nick did not respond. He seemed to have tired of the subject
and had become lost in thought. Then he said, “I missed you when you were
gone.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“So did I, Nick.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“You missed yourself?” This he delivered with a mischievous
grin as he ran out of the garden and jumped on his bike.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Yes, I thought. I had missed myself. I hadn’t realized this
until Nick’s joke. I had lost track of myself while in Florida where that is so
easy to do, and where it is actually encouraged. I had filled the space of me
with sensations and with other people. I had stopped generating my own heat,
with no one, myself included, seeing the difference. Then I got into the car
and returned, glad for the work needed in this garden, glad to find that in his growing up, Nick hasn't outgrown his visits to my garden, and glad even for the searing
cold of DisMay. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-33216145328428165692016-05-16T19:23:00.000-04:002016-05-16T19:23:06.967-04:00A Pope Who Loves Women<div class="MsoNormal">
There is a refreshingly heterosexual aura on Pope Francis.
He seems to be a man with a healthy and mature appreciation for real women.
This sets him apart from most of the hierarchy comprised of men who are stunted
in their visions of women, comfortable with an imaginary
Mary-Queen-Of-The-Universe-Star-Of-The Sea-Mediatrix-Of-Salvation, but
flummoxed by flesh-and-blood women with whom they shrink from shoulder-rubbing
in the halls of church authority. (I will return to why I think Francis is a
mature heterosexual at the conclusion of this.)</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Pope Francis has given sudden evidence of his appreciation
for real women in a spontaneous response to a nun who, during the May 12, 2016
meeting with the 50<sup>th</sup> anniversary conference of leaders of religious
orders of women (the International Union of Superiors General) dared to ask him
if the Catholic Church might be well served by women deacons. His answer – akin
to his “Who am I to judge?” comment that temporarily thrilled gay Catholics –
might be a slightly opened door to the ordination of women, albeit at a pace
that will probably prohibit the ordination of any of the nuns present for his
response in the Sala Nervi audience hall that day.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Pope Francis is willing to call for a study of the idea that
women might be ordained deacons. This is significant, even though it is the
same kind of side-stepping that he used when he convened a pow-wow over the
issues of marriage and family. Pope Francis harbors personal opinions about
these matters, but feels that it is his responsibility to act collegially and
to discern the will of God as voiced by his bishops. In the case of granting
Communion to divorced/remarried Catholics or granting marriage to LGBT
Catholics, Pope Francis let his bishops temper what I suspect was his personal
inclination to act more compassionately in those areas.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
What does a Roman Catholic deacon do, and what would be the
impact of women deacons. In short, a lot! <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
(continued after the break)</div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p></o:p></div>
<a name='more'></a><br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
A deacon can do everything a priest can do sacramentally
except offer Mass (Eucharist) and grant absolution via the sacrament of Penance
(Confession.) In a twist that is perhaps indicative of the media-driven time in
which we live, reserving the sacramental act of transforming bread and wine into the body and blood of Jesus to male priests has less impact than allowing women
the deacon’s voice, not just proclaiming the Gospel during Mass but also preaching/delivering
the homily. Having women deacons would mean that the Catholic in the pew on
Sunday might receive most of the vocalized sentiment and truth about God <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">via a woman</i>. The central mystery of
Transubstantiation would be reserved to the male priesthood, but because it is
a mystery, it is already beyond our hearing. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Women proclaiming the Gospel and preaching the Good News at
Mass is really not the biggest impact of allowing women to be ordained as
deacons. The biggest impact might be something Francis had not thought of when
he made his spontaneous response about having the issue studied. Ordaining
women to the diaconate opens the door to naming women cardinals. This is the
bonus round of women’s rights in the Catholic Church and a place where Church
tradition, law, history and progress get extremely confusing, and where it is
impossible to predict how the dominoes set in motion by the ordination of women
deacons may fall.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
The historical facts provide more openness than
prohibitions. St Paul mentions the deaconess Phoebe, but how her authority
stacked up against her male counterparts is anyone’s guess. Also, in the
earliest years of the Church, cardinals were not always ordained priests. They
were princes whose authority was practical and temporal. Even today, becoming a
cardinal does not involve a sacrament. In other words, it is the conferring of
an honorific that does not necessitate the flow of grace that comes through
sacraments. Over centuries, the church decided for practical reasons that popes
and cardinals really ought first to be ordained priests/bishops, but it took a
number of Church councils and papal proclamations to hammer out this
restriction. (The Synod of 769, the Papal Bull <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">In Nomine Domini</i> of 1059, the third Lateran Council of 1179 and the
revision of the Code of Canon Law by Pope Benedict XV in 1917 stating that all
cardinals must first be ordained priests/bishops. The last non-priest/bishop
cardinal died in 1899.)<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Adding to the historical confusion is the fact that there
are three classes of cardinals: cardinal bishops, cardinal priests and <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">cardinal deacons</i>. These distinctions are
rooted in extinctions involving Roman ecclesiastical infrastructure and
authority that simply do not exist today, even in the Curia. If women can be
ordained deacons, logic would dictate that they can also be made cardinals.
Once the College of Cardinals is populated by a significant number of women,
the Catholic Church will, if it has not yet expired under the suffocating weight
of its recalcitrant patriarchy, be revived by the election of a pope who will
dare to do what is in his/her heart and soul. This proposed study is the type of
leadership that Pope Francis favors. Timid about making sweeping changes, he is
quite willing to plant the seeds of change, trusting that long after he is
gone, good seed will produce good fruit.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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Why do I suspect that Pope Francis is a mature heterosexual?
Obscured by all he has said and done in the whirlwind of his papacy, was an
early report about how he, as Cardinal Bergoglio, treated a widow in Buenos
Aires. A predecessor bishop had left the priesthood to marry a woman. When that
bishop died, Bergoglio telephoned the widow every Sunday afternoon for several
years. This very simple gesture goes beyond civility and indicates his
acknowledgement of her value in his own episcopacy. He sought her out because
she possessed something he lacked as a celibate man, something that might
inform his leadership and shape his compassion. That is certainly not the kind
of counsel kept by most of the hierarchy.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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Finally, as happy as I am about Pope Francis’ openness to
the ordination of women deacons, he is well acquainted with how committees work
on these matters. When Pope Paul VI set up a committee to study the regulation
of birth, the majority report given to him by Jesuit Father Josef Fuchs (my
moral theology professor at the Gregorian University) was in favor of allowing
parents to make informed conscience-driven decisions. That report was discarded
in favor of a minority report that resulted in Paul’s 1968 encyclical <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Humanae Vitae</i> saying no to artificial
birth control.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Tossing an examination of the historical and traditional
indicators of the merits of ordaining women deacons to a committee directed by
a bunch of elderly virginal males protective of their exclusivity is not an encouraging
process. We’ll see, if we and the Catholic Church live long enough.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
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Meanwhile, I think back upon my time in the priesthood,
knowing that the greatest amount of good I did was through my presence at key
moments in the life of my parishioners, including baptizing their children,
marrying those in love and presiding over funeral rites for the departed. These
are among the responsibilities that would be granted to women deacons. These
are the moments that Catholics never forget. Give women this kind of voice and
authority, and they will be one or two generations away from full equality in
the Catholic Church.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I also recall my years in Rome as a seminarian. An order of
American nuns sent a young woman to Rome the year I was sent by my archbishop.
Sister Barbara attended all the classes I attended at the Gregorian University
for four years. She finished her course of studies with an award for
excellence, but in the course of those years, as I was received first into the
minor orders and then ordained a deacon and finally a priest, Sister Barbara
watched from a pew at every ceremony, praying for her privileged male friends.
She deserved the sacraments I received. Maybe it is not too late.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-37231765159160948762016-04-10T12:39:00.000-04:002016-04-10T12:39:06.027-04:00F2M Trans Mark Angelo Detransitions Back To Maritza<div class="MsoNormal">
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The trans community can be hostile, volatile and downright
dismissive when one of their own embraces an opinion that might be used to
support the arguments of their oppressors. That is why widely-followed Mark
Angelo Cummings, the Cuban born F2M (female-to-male) transsexual set off a
firestorm when he suggested that helping youngsters transition might be
misguided, and that his own transitioning might have been a big mistake.<o:p></o:p></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: right; margin-left: 1em; text-align: right;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB6q6JBf-j4JEehyRO5b_e1rdJ8in4T33kQg3fXxoq6nGdHkI06ZjGgEk4UmOfkzzuJIfbqpDYWHDIImsegeDDAeSsuT7IzyweONHIUeswYxXA3QNx1iCdK0Tvwz5dB2sNeB20/s1600/Mark%2526Lynna.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhB6q6JBf-j4JEehyRO5b_e1rdJ8in4T33kQg3fXxoq6nGdHkI06ZjGgEk4UmOfkzzuJIfbqpDYWHDIImsegeDDAeSsuT7IzyweONHIUeswYxXA3QNx1iCdK0Tvwz5dB2sNeB20/s320/Mark%2526Lynna.jpg" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Mark Angelo and Lynna Cummings</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
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His recent detransitioning back to “Maritza” outraged some
of his fans, and his controversial stance caused sponsors to dump him. His new
wife M2F trans Lynna admits that she is attracted to Mark more than Maritza. If
you are rolling your eyes, please wait a moment. This couple is wiser than any
headline might lead you to think.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Six years have passed since I wrote about Cummings for South
Florida Gay News (<a href="http://southfloridagaynews.com/Tony-Adams/mark-angelo-cummings-songs-in-the-key-of-f2m.html">http://southfloridagaynews.com/Tony-Adams/mark-angelo-cummings-songs-in-the-key-of-f2m.html</a>)
when he was living in Hollywood, Florida, with his then-wife Violet, and
beginning a career as a singer/songwriter. After several years traveling and
living in New Mexico, and with a few unsuccessful relationships with men and
women behind him, Cummings has returned to Fort Lauderdale with his new
wife.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>When I ask him if he has continued
to write songs and to perform, he seems surprised by the question, and it is
clear that he has spent six years generating an all-encompassing online presence
in word, image and video about what it means to be trans. That did not leave
much time for music.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
To be clear, his detransitioning back to female is on hold
for the moment as the couple takes this time to settle into Victoria Park and a
new phase of their life. You can still follow Cummings’ brutally honest
self-presentation on Facebook, on his blog and on his Youtube channel where fans’
tempers sometimes flare. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimIsCIjU1U_tx9OlhIDABOxsAnLoBBN-lcfbTs7JTfA_HPbZrNWBjHJMJstATMczNdissZr5kIWBgtTJPoShRmWTrqnJd1L18qt9ccPha2kY6pFNaFd8P4ERUs9VBxiZ6z66LI/s1600/maritza.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimIsCIjU1U_tx9OlhIDABOxsAnLoBBN-lcfbTs7JTfA_HPbZrNWBjHJMJstATMczNdissZr5kIWBgtTJPoShRmWTrqnJd1L18qt9ccPha2kY6pFNaFd8P4ERUs9VBxiZ6z66LI/s320/maritza.jpg" width="240" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">Maritza</td></tr>
</tbody></table>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Cummings did not disguise his very practical reasons for
stopping his detransitioning. The money, the icy reception by his parents, the
apartment hunt and his wife’s love put a stake through the heart of the freshly
reborn Maritza. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Online, he clearly describes his practical decision with
these words, “All of the events that took place from pounding the pavements
finding an apartment that would be affordable, in a good neighborhood and free
from scammers, led to my knowing that detransitioning was not an option for me
after all. I felt vulnerable as Maritza and had to use, yes I know, my male
privilege to get the job done. It is a jungle out there and unfortunately my
alpha nature [as Mark] is needed to be taken seriously and to protect my wife
and I during certain situations[…]Nonetheless I don’t regret the 3 months of my
attempts to detransition, but in those three months, I quickly learned how much
I hated fussing over myself, the make up, the worrying about what I was going
to wear, the looking in the mirror and not liking what I saw. In the end, it
would take way too much money to detransition and to make things look
presentable after 13 years of testosterone and all of the secondary
characteristics that it created. I am who I am, and after all at 51 years
of age, I can’t put myself through all of that. I became Mark 13 years ago, and
Mark I shall remain.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Building on those words, I asked Mark who he actually is. He
replied, “I am two-spirited. Sometimes the female part of my nature comes to
the foreground and sometimes my male side dominates. I think we are all like
that to some degree.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
In listening to Mark and Lynna, I find that what separates
them from most people is their fearless ability to give expression to what is
in their hearts without worrying about the approval of others, and free from
the assumption that today’s decision must be monumental or permanent.
Gender-presentation seems to be a small part of their deep devotion to each
other, and the gifts they give each other are more lavish than their sex
organs.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Lynna tells me that soon after their arrival in Fort
Lauderdale, Mark brought her to the Wilton Manors bar <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Alibi. </i>Walking through that door, Mark rejoiced at being in a crowd
of gay men and proclaimed them to be his people. Did that moment upset Lynna?
Not in the slightest. She shrugs and smiles when she tells me about this. She
knows and cherishes her husband to the core. She accepts the entire package
that is Mark Angelo <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">and</i> Maritza
Cummings without much concern about the wrapping. Glad to have all three of
them nearby, I hope Mark will pick up his guitar and write some new songs.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For more, check out <a href="http://www.transitionradio.net/">http://www.transitionradio.net</a><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/markangeloc">http://www.youtube.com/user/markangeloc</a><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<o:p> </o:p>(In print and online this week in South Florida Gay News - <a href="http://sfgn.com/">sfgn.com</a>) </div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-5793358013010490152016-04-08T15:20:00.000-04:002016-05-16T20:47:23.892-04:00Pope Tevye And The Fiddler On The Roof Of St. Peter’s<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />My Analysis Of Pope Francis’ Exhortation <i>Amoris Laetitia</i><br /><br /> <br />Throughout two years of anticipation for <i>Amoris Laetitia</i>, few hoped it would open the door to same-sex marriage in the Catholic Church, while many hoped it would allow divorced and remarried Catholics to openly receive the sacrament of Holy Communion. Because of the way Francis weighs his options and considers various points of view before making any decision, he reminds me very much of the dairy farmer Tevye in the musical <i>Fiddler On The Roof</i>. He is a man who loves tradition but he loves his family even more. In the course of the musical, Tevya gives in to his daughters’ wishes until he is finally pushed to the wall over an issue he cannot condone. This Exhortation he calls <i>Amoris Laetitia – The Joy Of Love</i> - constitutes such a wall for Pope Francis regarding divorced and remarried Catholics seeking to receive Communion, and LGBT Catholics seeking sacramental marriage. In order to become hopeful or to read-it-and-weep, let's have a look at what he says.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>[Read on]</b></span></div>
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<a name='more'></a><span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /><br />In Section 2., Pope Francis sets out his guiding principle: avoid the two extremes of changing everything and changing nothing.</b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>The debates carried on in the media, in certain publications and even among the Church’s ministers, range from an immoderate desire for total change without sufficient reflection or grounding, to an attitude that would solve everything by applying general rules or deriving undue conclusions from particular theological considerations. </b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />Section 3. is interesting. He reminds us that not everything needs to be resolved by the Magisterium, and that interpretations of authority can vary. He also says this about diversity:</b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Each country or region, moreover, can seek solutions better suited to its culture and sensitive to its traditions and local needs.</b></span></i></blockquote>
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b>In Section 6., he says he will conclude his Exhortation with</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><i>Finally, I will offer an invitation to mercy and the pastoral discernment of those situations that fall short of what the Lord demands of us</i> </b></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />This is a gathering of dark clouds. Is he going to say that my same-sex marriage falls short of what is demanded by the Lord?<br /><br />Chapter One is a whirlwind tour of all the references to family that resonate with this pope. It might be of interest only to those who know nothing about the bible because it shows you the literary Judeo-Christian influences that form the Catholic mindset. Does he skirt any biblical references to gay marriage in this? Of course not, because that institution did not exist when this stuff was written. Yes, King David had a boyfriend he might have wished to have married, but we don’t find that wedding in scripture because it was unthinkable at the time. Instead, we get from scripture only David’s Amoris Laetitia – his joy of love. In the same way, we read about the disciple John as the lover of Jesus sharing a special relationship. They shared Amoris Laetitia - the joy of love….but not marriage.<br /><br />In Chapter 2, Pope Francis notes that families have changed through the years. Spouses now share more responsibilities equally. In Section 33., he hits his oft repeated belief that in a marriage, personalism is good but that individualism is bad. Also, he notes but offers no explanation for the decreasing number of marriages in many countries. I am glad to see In Section 34 that he understands this basic fact of contemporary western culture: </b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>The ideal of marriage, marked by a commitment to exclusivity and stability, is swept aside whenever it proves inconvenient or tiresome. The fear of loneliness and the desire for stability and fidelity exist side by side with a growing fear of entrapment in a relationship that could hamper the achievement of one’s personal goals. </b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />Pope Francis is right to wring his hands about the fact that there is a disposability to marriage these days in which the contract is burned as soon as the slightest problem arises, with couples splitting and recoupling in ways that make family life too complex to manage. But in section 38., He cites Africa as an example of good and stable marriage. Really?<br /><br />In Sections 42. and 45., Pope Francis decries the impoverishment of the declining birthrate and the sad reality of abused “street children.” You’d think this would be a great opportunity to laud same-sex couples who choose to accept disadvantaged children into their lives, but no.<br /><br />In Section 52., Pope Francis slams shut the doors of the Roman Catholic Church in the face of same-sex marriage. </b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>There is a failure to realize that only the exclusive and indissoluble union between a man and a woman has a plenary role to play in society as a stable commitment that bears fruit in new life. We need to acknowledge the great variety of family situations that can offer a certain stability, but de facto or same-sex unions, for example, may not simply be equated with marriage. No union that is temporary or closed to the transmission of life can ensure the future of society.</b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />In <i>Chapter Three</i>, Pope Francis says he will gaze upon Jesus to understand family, but instead, he reverts to a rehash of what recent popes have written, including Benedict XVI’s excruciating comparison of marriage to the crucifixion of Jesus in his Encyclical <i>Deus Caritas Est.</i><br /><br />The section of <i>Chapter Three</i> called “The Sacrament of Matrimony” is noteworthy because it reaches the essence of Catholic belief and practice. Catholics say that sacraments are vehicles for the delivery of God’s grace. (Think of God as an ocean and “grace” as an uncontrollable tide or flood of God.) Here, Pope Francis has a perfect opportunity to say that same-sex couples share a love that often facilitates the flow of grace, but he refuses to even mention the possibility. By omission, he is saying that no good can come from such a union and that is could never be sacramental.<br /><br />Sections 80. and 81. are a weird pretzel in which Pope Francis dances in circles about conjugal acts, procreation, how children don’t come from the outside of a family (?) and how even couples that are childless can still be open to the “meaning” of procreation. This is the kind of bad poetry that elderly celibates often produce. Skip this part or risk becoming infuriated by it.<br /><br />In Section 125., Pope Francis says that marriage is a “friendship marked by passion” but he again refuses to look at how this very good definition might be applied to same-sex unions. He has not really thought this through. In Sections 133. – 141., he talks like an “agony aunt” about the need for three magical words in marriage, “Please, thank you and sorry” but he refuses to look at how his marital advice easily would apply to same-sex couples. <br /><br />His waxings about virginity and celibacy in marriage (Sections 159.-162.) are at best apologetic.<br /><br />Section 172. will offend same-sex couples with children. Here, Pope Francis says that every child has a right to the distinct love of both a father and a mother, without which a child is just a “plaything.”<br /><br />In Sections 179. and 180., Pope Francis praises the generosity of couples who adopt children, but he refuses to include same-sex couples in that praise.<br /><br />For those waiting to hear what he has to say about the headline issue of divorced and remarried Catholics being barred from receiving Communion, he begins to “go there” when he condemns those who are judgmental and divisive, saying in Section 186., </b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>When those who receive it turn a blind eye to the poor and suffering, or consent to various forms of division, contempt and inequality, the Eucharist is received unworthily.</b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />If that’s true, I know a planet full of popes, cardinals, bishops and priests who ought to be denied Communion!<br /><br />In Section 197., he extols the virtues of the larger family that can include relatives, the sick, those living alone and those who are troubled, but he refuses to specifically mention or include the LGBT people who are denied the opportunity to marry and form families according to his definition. <br /><br />Section 202. of Chapter Six is eye-popping in that it is the first clear indication that Pope Francis is in favor of a married clergy. He says that pastors have shown a lack of understanding about married life because they are single, and that the married clergy of the eastern sects of Catholicism do a better job of it!</b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>In the replies given to the worldwide consultation, it became clear that ordained ministers often lack the training needed to deal with the complex problems currently facing families. The experience of the broad oriental tradition of a married clergy could also be drawn upon. </b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br />While Pope Francis is on solid ground in <i>Amoris Laetitia</i> when he talks about the need for communication, respect, gratitude and courage in moments of crisis faced by husbands, wives and families, he does not apply any of that wisdom to same-sex couples. <br /><br />Sections 243. and 299. will disappoint any divorced and remarried Catholics who want to receive Communion openly. Pope Francis says they should be treated with care and kindness and respect, but he stops short of giving them access to receiving Communion.<br /><br />Likewise, Section 250. will disappoint any LGBT Catholics who want equality in their church. Pope Francis says they should be treated with care, kindness and respect, but he stops short of offering marriage.<br /><br />Section 251. puts the final nails into the coffin of Roman Catholic same-sex marriage in its flat and simple reiteration of what Pope Francis has said elsewhere:</b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>In discussing the dignity and mission of the family, the Synod Fathers observed that, “as for proposals to place unions between homo- sexual persons on the same level as marriage, there are absolutely no grounds for considering homosexual unions to be in any way similar or even remotely analogous to God’s plan for marriage and family”. It is unacceptable “that local Churches should be subjected to pressure in this matter and that international bodies should make financial aid to poor countries dependent on the introduction of laws to establish ‘marriage’ between persons of the same sex”. </b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /><br />Rather than leave bad enough alone, in Section 283., regarding the education of children, Pope Francis takes a shot at teaching “safe sex” which he sees only as an evil way of avoiding procreation.</b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>Frequently, sex education deals primarily with “protection” through the practice of “safe sex”. Such expressions convey a negative attitude towards the natural procreative finality of sexuality, as if an eventual child were an enemy to be protected against. This way of thinking promotes narcissism and aggressivity in place of acceptance. </b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /><br />Noteworthy is that Pope Francis does not quote just the Old Testament, St. Paul, St. Thomas Aquinas, the last few popes before him, Dietrich Bonhoeffer and his own older homilies. He also quotes, in Section 284., the Jewish socialist psychologist Erich Fromm! Oddly refreshing, but I guess we are supposed to overlook the fact that Fromm was a divorced man of multiple marriages.<br /><br />Again, rather than leaving bad enough alone, he takes a shot, in section 258, at the trans community when talking about how children ought to be taught to accept the bodies they are born with rather than play “creator” by making adjustments.</b></span><br />
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<i><span style="font-size: large;"><b>the young need to be helped to accept their own body as it was created, for “thinking that we enjoy absolute power over our own bodies turns, often subtly, into thinking that we enjoy absolute power over creation... An appreciation of our body as male or female is also necessary for our own self-awareness in an encounter with others different from ourselves. In this way we can joyfully accept the specific gifts of fear of being different, can we be freed of self-centredness and self-absorption. Sex education should help young people to accept their own bodies and to avoid the pretension “to cancel out sexual difference because one no longer knows how to deal with it”.</b></span></i></blockquote>
<span style="font-size: large;"><b><br /> <br />In Section 293., Pope Francis reports that his bishops discussed their treatment of folks who are in civil (not sacramental) marriages or simply co-habitating. The bishops decided that it is preferable to try to make nice-nice with those couples only because they might eventually be enticed to convert their sinful unions into sacramental marriages. This obviously precludes any nice-nice-making for same-sex couples because that eventual door to sacramental marriage remains closed ever more firmly by dint of this document.<br /><br />In Section 300, Pope Francis finally admits that there is nothing new in this Exhortation and that we shouldn’t have expected any rule-changes from him or his bishops. In <i>Chapter Eight</i> of <i>Amoris Laetitia,</i> he reminds priests that they do have the ability to recognize certain factors in the lives of Catholics who are divorced and remarried that might mitigate their status as “mortal sinners.” Among those is the “It’s just too difficult to practice that virtue” argument that Pope Francis suggests priests use when wrestling with the issue of giving Communion to folks living in sin. Again, he does not suggest deploying this mercy in the treatment of same-sex couples.<br /><br />At the conclusion of <i>Amoris Laetitia</i>, Pope Francis says “All family life is a ‘shepherding’ in mercy.” I think he really believes that. Sadly, he cannot bring himself to fully practice what he preaches.<br /><br /> <br /><br /> <br /><br /> </b></span></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-18955026676696586292016-03-12T07:14:00.002-05:002016-03-12T07:17:18.935-05:00Hillary Clinton On The Reagans' Response To AIDS<div style="color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px;">
Want to learn about the Reagan/AIDS backstory in your weighing the inaccurate remarks and apology made by Hillary regarding Nancy and Ronald Reagan's response to the epidemic? Do these four easy things.</div>
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First, watch this video if you haven't already seen it on Savagelove:</div>
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<a href="https://thescene.com/watch/vanityfair/the-reagan-administration-s-chilling-response-to-the-aids-crisis" rel="nofollow" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">https://thescene.com/…/the-reagan-administration-s-chilling…</a></div>
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Then read this brief bio of the journalist who questioned the ultimately discredited Larry Speakes </div>
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<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lester_Kinsolving" rel="nofollow" style="color: #3b5998; cursor: pointer; text-decoration: none;" target="_blank">https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lester_Kinsolving</a>. </div>
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Even though Kinsolving helped bring AIDS into the public and presidential eyes, he was basically and religiously anti-gay. That is why you don't see him being trotted down mainstreets as grand marshall at Pride marches. He is a mixed bag, hero and foe. </div>
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Then, consider Hillary's record. Some say she came late to her advocacy for the LGBT community. That is true of everyone in the world. No one is born swaddled in the rainbow flag. Some get there before others, but she has done good for us in recent years. I don't care about her motives.</div>
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Finally, consider how it felt to come out of the closet at the onset of AIDS as did my husband in 1982/83 when verified deaths from AIDS were in only the hundreds but young gay men desperately needed guidance and information rather than the derisive laughter of a presidential press secretary.</div>
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People are complicated. Some want to lead others. Some just want to have fun. Others wake up, look at the ocean and wonder how long it would take to swim to the horizon. Would I have the strength? Would I be attacked by a sea creature from the depths? What will be there when I get there?</div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-46065461957820191332016-01-29T08:36:00.002-05:002016-01-29T08:53:58.806-05:00Where Were We?<div style="color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 6px;">
<span style="font-size: large;">So, where were we?</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Where were we before weird candidates for President became our primary source of entertainment? I know there had at one time been a coliseum filled with crazed Romans who liked this kind of thing, but that place is in ruins, and those people lost their empire. I thought we had moved on.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Where were we before God became a weapon in the hands of tormented idiots? I know we used to fear the dark and worship the sun, but I thought we had moved on.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Where were we before sex became complicated and regulated and bound inextricably to some dreamlike notion of family values? I know it used to be more animalistic than poetic, but I thought we had struck a balance that respected the playful and fluid essence of sex.</span></div>
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Where were we before our workdays smothered us so thoroughly that those moments when we laugh deliriously and deeply become memorable and identifiable and able to be counted on the fingers of one hand? I know that even tending a rose garden is work, but when did we stop singing while we work? That was a tragic day in the life of anyone alive. And, if you never sang while you worked, that is even worse.</div>
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Where were we before we convinced ourselves to pay more money for stuff than we have in our pockets? When did we begin to think that all that stuff was necessary? When did we accept debt into our lives, which is really just a form of slavery?</div>
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Where were we before we stopped using our beautiful bodies as they were designed, and started going to a gym to do the things we should be doing all day long? I know we used to eat good food in its natural state, and not too much of it, but we became too smart about food production for our own good. We wanted sweeter everything, and we gave it to ourselves. When did we throw out the instruction sheet to our bodies?</div>
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Where were we before we wholeheartedly and completely gave our thinking and feeling to machines for simulation? I know we used to use electric toasters because that was easier than holding bread over a fire pit, but when did we vacate our feelings and thoughts by making them simplistic and universal and accessible in an off-the-shelf way? When did we stop being quirky and unique? When did we decide that it is good to be part of something big?</div>
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So, tell me again. Where were we?</div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-42821925806201832802016-01-29T07:48:00.000-05:002016-01-31T09:42:28.918-05:00Marco Rubio Is No Kennedy Catholic<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span style="font-size: large;">For the last fifty years, Roman Catholic politicians have
been talking “ChristianLite” when invoking God. That changed in the last
Republican presidential debate before the Iowa caucus, when Marco Rubio boldly
worshipped his “Jesus Christ, who came down to earth and died for our sins.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Most of us have not heard that kind of theology since the
days when, as children, we had to memorize the answers to all those perplexing
questions in the <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Baltimore Catechism</i>.
Little Marco obviously learned them well, and his pious proclamation on the
floor of the debate should put tears of joy in the eyes of every American
cardinal and bishop who have in him a candidate they can control.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">We have had all sorts of Christian presidents, including one
– Taft – who did not believe in the divinity of Jesus Christ. We have had a few
who were disinterested in religion – Andrew Johnson, Hayes, Lincoln – and we
have had exactly one Roman Catholic president - John F. Kennedy - who adored
Marilyn more than Mary. In Rubio, we would get the real Catholic deal, and this
should be frightening to any God-fearing American man or woman who is
disinclined to bind the country under the yoke of the papacy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">The most startling aspect of Rubio’s debate proclamation is
his clear belief in the pre-existence of Jesus Christ. Rubio believes that the
son of God existed somewhere in the universe (in heaven maybe?) before he “came
down” to earth to fix the mess we have made. In Rubio’s belief, Jesus wasn’t
just a twinkle in the eye of God but rather a real guy waiting in the wings, or
on the bench, for his chance to be born and die. Like God the father, Jesus had
been around for all eternity, killing time with his dad somewhere outside the
boundaries of time itself, until he got the irresistible urge for his brief
Middle Eastern saga.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">When I was a child in Catholic grade school and menaced by
the Sisters of Mercy, I did not cotton to this bit of theology. It seemed to me
to be downright stupid for God to pre-arrange something like the passion, death
and resurrection of his only son. The script of any episode of <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">I Love Lucy</i> made more sense to me,
concurrently schooled as I was by early television, than did the idea that the
life of Jesus Christ was, in literally excruciating detail, inevitable. I kept
this heretical opinion to myself, and recited the words of the Creed just like
all the other kids, figuring that they had not yet realized the nonsense of at
all. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">There is a second aspect of Rubio’s debate proclamation, the
notion that Jesus had to come down here to take on our sins. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>As a child, I had serious problems with this.
Why couldn’t God just snap his fingers to clean up our sins the way ladies on
the television make their kitchen appliances sparkle with a quick swipe of
something new?<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Why couldn’t he just
clear the table in his workshop? Like every other kid in my hometown, I had an <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Etch A Sketch</i> with which I could make
any design I imagined and then simply flip the toy upside down to erase it and
start over again. Surely God in his infinite brilliance could do even better
than that.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">Also, I never felt that I had been born bad, or that without
redemption by Jesus I would go to hell. In second grade, I pestered Sister
Josephine about the idea of baptism. “You mean we were born with sins already
inside us?” When she nodded yes, I could see in her eyes that she knew I would
be trouble. (She eventually left the convent, married and had her own kids. I
wonder if she had them baptized.) The seven-year old heretic, I kept my
reservations private while I made my first Confession and received my First
Holy Communion, carefully keeping the host from touching my teeth because Jesus,
who had been floating eternally in space and had then taken on human flesh, was
now a piece of bread that I had to eat in order to get to heaven where all of
this stuff would finally be explained. <span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">How would we do with a president who energetically spouts
his belief in the literal particulars of Roman Catholicism? Not well. He would
have to dismantle same-sex marriage. He would have to say that it is okay to
feel gay urges, but sinful to have gay sex of any kind. He would have to make
sure that children are adopted only by couples consisting of one man and one
woman. He would have to get LGBT teachers out of classrooms. He would have to
insist that Americans keep every sex act open to the possibility of
procreation. He would have to reverse <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Roe
v. Wade</i> and instruct all Americans that abortion is murder. Worst of all,
he would appoint Supreme Court Justices guided by “Jesus Christ, who came down
to earth and died for our sins.” So many awful words to be added to the Pledge
of Allegiance.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-28363106873486367672016-01-02T23:26:00.001-05:002016-01-02T23:26:13.455-05:00The Bee Or Not The Bee<div style="color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 6px;">
<span style="font-size: large;">When you talked merrily about your tendency to hoard, describing stacks of magazines you’ve acquired by dint of subscription, I didn’t laugh. I’ll tell you why. Suddenly grave, I thought of a close friend of mine who hoardes. Brilliant, but incapacitated and suffocated by all that he has held onto. Driving away from his disastrous home, I always believe that the right man could have saved him from this.</span><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></div>
<div style="color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
<span style="font-size: large;">Isn’t it okay to rely on friends and lovers we do not wish to disappoint<span class="text_exposed_show" style="display: inline;">? To entrust to them our improvement? Isn’t it okay to do the right thing only at the urgings of friends and lovers? Isn’t that why we maintain friends and lovers, because without them we would drown in ourselves? Isn’t it not a source of shame that our friends and lovers resolve for us those terrible flaws that we cannot fix in ourselves? Isn’t that the design of human interaction? Isn’t that the one good lesson of Jesus? He needed friends and lovers! He called them disciples! They saved him more than he saved them.</span></span></div>
<div class="text_exposed_show" style="color: #141823; display: inline; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><div style="margin-bottom: 6px;">
Last night around 9PM, a large bee soared high enough into the ocean-slapped black sky to enter my open windows and careen about my place finally ending up in the glare of the inverted glass bowl of the ceiling-mounted light fixture in the kitchen. That bee was alone, with none of its hive to say to it, “You’re in trouble. This is not the sun. This is just a thing they call a light bulb. Do not go to it. Get out of here. You’re confused. You flew too high. What were you thinking? You need to come home.” What they didn’t tell that bee was that it was too late. </div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 6px; margin-top: 6px;">
In the morning, when I got up out of bed and headed to the coffeemaker, I looked up at the light fixture, and through the frosted glass of the bowl, I saw the curled remains of that bee. I haven’t had the heart to get out the ladder, unscrew the fixture and dump it out. A year from now, it will probably still be there, over my head, like a sword. I expect to daily learn something from the sight of this, as do those who repeat rosaries. Or not.</div>
</span></div>
Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-32219131860407699672015-12-22T13:50:00.000-05:002015-12-22T13:50:09.814-05:00On Our 32nd Anniversary
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">There are at least twelve thousand justifiable reasons to
end a marriage, a love affair or a friendship. Men never quite measure up to your
expectations. There are at least twelve thousand ways in which a man can
disappoint you or hurt you when you give your life over to him. If you seize
upon these reasons and his imperfections, you will walk. You’ll find another
man, reset the odometer and find those twelve thousand flaws in someone new. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">On
your more rational days, you’ll look into the mirror and know that there are
twelve thousand ways in which you yourself are a disastrous friend, lover or
husband. But on your wisest of days, you’ll count twelve thousand reasons for
loving him, not the least of which is that he loves you back. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-size: large;">Today is my
seventh wedding anniversary and the anniversary of the day I met Christopher thirty-two
years ago. I shudder to think of the times we could have called it quits, and of
how terrible it would have been to let our dissatisfactions overrule the
irreplaceable good we find in each other. His wisdom, kindness, patience and
beauty are all I have and all I ever will have. For twelve thousand days we
have been together and he has given me countless reasons to want twelve
thousand more</span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNYrcVLlnqQv1eaxmabvmY3Znbd-kZVbvfYUfuJTiKqe4KN03Yzt6THro-u9ZEpvLwWrhr8LgwxKw8DIMSH0k1hfqHh73re8vbs0sjCR9dDSHo9hgVTmwXZLXs475kZo8fUJQ2/s1600/Lamb11.30.13redux.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjNYrcVLlnqQv1eaxmabvmY3Znbd-kZVbvfYUfuJTiKqe4KN03Yzt6THro-u9ZEpvLwWrhr8LgwxKw8DIMSH0k1hfqHh73re8vbs0sjCR9dDSHo9hgVTmwXZLXs475kZo8fUJQ2/s640/Lamb11.30.13redux.jpg" width="520" /></a></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-23046901708621842902015-12-10T11:07:00.002-05:002015-12-10T11:08:22.986-05:00Can The Self-respecting Gay Vote Republican?<span style="font-size: large;">My opinion about gays voting Republican, online and in print in <i>South Florida Gay News</i></span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<div class="_5pbx userContent" data-ft="{"tn":"K"}" id="js_p" style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; color: #141823; font-family: helvetica, arial, sans-serif; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: normal; letter-spacing: normal; line-height: 1.38; orphans: auto; overflow: hidden; text-align: start; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; white-space: normal; widows: auto; word-spacing: 0px;">
</div>
<a href="http://southfloridagaynews.com/Tony-Adams/column-can-the-self-respecting-gay-vote-republican.html"><span style="font-size: large;">http://southfloridagaynews.com/…/column-can-the-self-respec…</span></a><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7u6wI3_efMx-utdlpRnVTiO0RXcPh5JXUo5JqYrvuQezUhbD24k4sZQ7cEpGzPjwweIxa9Zx2_Nlay86lVlcHUM0c8gk4xUNeTd3lo9rXJCAyvT_jE59r3FpjC2bUeXd33y4D/s1600/page0000031.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7u6wI3_efMx-utdlpRnVTiO0RXcPh5JXUo5JqYrvuQezUhbD24k4sZQ7cEpGzPjwweIxa9Zx2_Nlay86lVlcHUM0c8gk4xUNeTd3lo9rXJCAyvT_jE59r3FpjC2bUeXd33y4D/s1600/page0000031.jpg" /></a></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-68563943645825364202015-09-30T15:34:00.000-04:002015-09-30T15:34:09.523-04:00<div class="MsoNormal">
“How is everything at Breakdown Academy?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I looked up from the dirt newly emptied of the last of the
beets. I was about to plant one hundred garlic cloves (and ten daffodils that I
couldn’t resist at my last dalliance with the siren, Home Depot.)<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Nick bounded in through the open gate with a
comb in his hands and enough product in his densely adolescent black hair to
blow up a prom with the strike of a match.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>He rolled his eyes and wailed, “It’s Break<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">through</i>!”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Right.” We have had this schtick ongoing since the day in
midsummer when a mournful Nick dragged his feet into the garden and said, “Mr.
Tony, can we talk?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Of course.” I gestured to his favorite chair, the green
one. Before he sat down, he positioned my favorite, the blue one, opposite him.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“My parents are sending me to a magnet school. I don’t want
to go. I want to go to the Middle School with all my friends. I’m going to burn
it down.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Nicholas, let’s have no talk of violence even if I know you
don’t mean it. A magnet school! My goodness, doesn’t that sound…attractive. Is
it like that school in Fame where Irene Cara danced her way to Broadway without
ever learning geometry?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No. It’s Breakthrough Academy and I have to take a bus to
get there. I don’t know anyone there. I hate it.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“A bus? How thrilling. Think of the alluring strangers and
the raw emotion. Think of Inge’s <i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">Bus Stop</i>.
Or that song by the Hollies. And think of all the magnetic new friends you’ll
have at Outbreak Academy.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Breakthrough.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Right. Is it magnetized to attract a certain type of
student?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“It’s for social skills.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Oh I see. And you’ll be there as a shining beacon to your
classmates? A dazzling example of winning comportment? A totem of aspiration
for clumsy local children who need the luminous template of your polished
persona?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No, and I won’t go.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes you will go. I assume this is your parents’ doing?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Well they know best, and you will obey. When I was your
age, my parents forced me to take a bus to a Catholic school. I hated it, but I
went. Have you ever heard of Governor Grasso?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Well let’s hope she’s included in the Breakup curriculum.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Break<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;">through</i>.” <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Right. Ella Grasso was the first woman governor elected in
her own right. She was governor of our own grand Connecticut. There had been a
woman governor down south named Lurleen, but she was just filling in for her
dead husband. Can you imagine a governor named Lurleen? Anyway, Ella Grasso
supposedly said, ‘Bloom where you are planted.’ This makes a lot of sense, and
it is exactly what you, Nicholas, will do at Breakneck. You won’t just try to
make friends, you will be the star of that academy. You are going to burst
through those doors every morning with a brilliant smile and a firm handshake
and a way of making everyone in the classroom appreciate you. Everyone will be
drawn to you because of how they just feel better when you’re around. You are
going to be the star of Breaking Bad Academy.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nick had stopped listening. He looked about ready to skulk
away wondering why he had even thought to share all this with me. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Nick, let me tell you a brief story. I was forced to go to
a college that I did not like, but I went, and I did well, and eventually, I
got to go where I wanted to go.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
I kept the details unspoken, but I was referring to the fact
that when I had completed six years in the “minor seminary” – high school plus
the first two years of college – the bishop assigned me to Our Lady of Angels
Seminary near Albany, New York. He assigned all of my friends to St. John’s
Seminary in Boston. I was wretchedly unhappy about this. I put up with it, and
two years later, that same bishop asked me to go to Rome for four years of
postgraduate studies. This, to me, defined revenge. It made me sure that I was
the Scarlett O’Hara of the clergy.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Nick, when life hands you lemons, you make lemonade. Have
you ever heard that saying before?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“No.” He was sullen.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Well now you have, so I want you to go home, and tell your
parents that you are ready to make the lemonade, okay?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Two months had passed since that conversation. Nick, as I
suspected, adjusted to The Breakers with ease. As always happens, he fell in
with the wrong crowd on day one and was relieved of a twenty dollar bill given
to him by his father in case of emergency. Toward the end of our summer, Nick
began taking huge delight in the fact that he is now taller than me, repeatedly
demanding that we stand up face-to-face. Every time we did, I’d swear he had
acquired another half inch. Racing down the street on his bike, his voice
cracked as he hollered to his friends. By this time next year, I ‘m sure he’ll
have no desire to talk to someone as uncool as me. This is how it all and
always goes. People come into our lives at a moment that can only be described
as right for reasons unknown to any of us who are handed our scripts, and then
the tide takes that moment out and washes out the colors of this garden, this
season, the strictness of spires and the calling of bells. Everything changes.
You can’t hold on. Pulled out into the future, you look back at the shore and the
sun is too bright to remember. <o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
For the moment Nick stands before me with an announcement.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“I have a girlfriend. No, I have two girlfriends.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Two? This can only end badly.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Well one of them is only my girlfriend because she is
popular. I really like the other one.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Do they each know about the other?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes! The one I like said she knows I only like the other
one because she is popular and she is okay with that.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“She sounds like a doormat. I think the three of you should
sit down and watch “A Place In The Sun.” She won’t be so understanding when she
sees what happened to Shelley Winters.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Mr. Tony, are you married?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Yes.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Who are you married to?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Enough about me. Let’s talk about you.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“My dad says it’s rude to talk about myself and that I
should get others to talk about themselves.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Your dad is right, except in this instance. Ask him what
you asked me and see what he says.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Nick turned to leave the garden and find his father. As is
always his way, whenever I suggest he ask his parents something, he runs to do
it immediately, leaving me regretful about the suggestion.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Nick, before you go, I want to show you one thing. Look at
this. Do you know what it is?”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“That’s a lilac.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
“Right. Remember when it bloomed? Remember the scent? Well
these little nubbins at the end of each branch are going to be the flowers that
come out next summer. Once it is done blooming, the lilac sets buds. Now, a
zillion bad things can happen to those buds which would mean no flowers next
summer. A gardener with lesser skills might prune them off, for instance.
Something bad in the dirt might poison the plant and keep it from flowering.
That is what drugs do to kids, right? Maybe there won’t be enough rain, and the
buds will dry up and fall off. That would be like you not getting love from
your parents and friendship from your cohorts at BreakItUp. Maybe a deep freeze
and a snow avalanche will break off the branches. Who knows? Bad things can
happen. I go south for the winter soon, and I will come back just in time to
see this lilac bloom. When I come back, I want to find all these buds intact and
swelling, and I want to find that you have weathered your first year at<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Breakfast Academy with no permanent
disasters. You are going to have to take care of yourself, Nick. Don’t be too
silly. Don’t listen too much to what your friends say. They know nothing. Treat
those girlfriends very well. With respect. Don’t be in a hurry to do anything.
You have so much time.”<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
He glazed over, as I knew he would. As I knew I would have
at that age. As I knew the lilac does. The universe does not listen to
anything. We just do. We are lucky or we crash into things like asteroids. We
can’t keep a young fellow from what will befall him even though we want it more
than anything else in the world.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
My husband never says so, but I know that when he comes home
from work and I tell him about the planting I did, he will know that it means I
intend another year. No one who flees throws seed.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
Everything is set and ready for the winter. I just need to
let go now. I can’t control what will happen to my lilacs, to my garlic, to
Nick, to my husband and to myself. I have done what I could and it is enough.<o:p></o:p></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-3836581725359617572014-03-25T21:03:00.002-04:002014-03-25T21:03:28.571-04:00The Lovable Gay Landliners<h2 style="background-color: white; color: #333333; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', 'Helvetica Neue', HelveticaNeue, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 30px; line-height: 1.2; margin: -5px 0px -4px;">
<a href="http://rien-acacher.tumblr.com/post/80731526146/the-lovable-gay-landliners" style="color: #333333; display: block; text-decoration: none;"><br /></a></h2>
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Tonight I attended a “landliners” cocktail party. This is a descriptive I have come up with for gay men in their 70s and 80s who have some begrudging usage of modern communication but can’t quite part with their home phones. The hosts have a landline in Fort Lauderdale, another in Manhattan and another in Connecticut. They accept the premise of seasonality in which each of those lines hibernates w<span class="text_exposed_show">hile the other is awake. With some overlap. They have all also accepted the merits of email. Which they find exciting and progressive. Still, they don’t receive those messages as often as they receive the contents of the mailboxes at the ends of their various driveways. With landliners, you have to be careful in the contacting. What was the party like? Enchanting! These men were alert, engaged, clever and dazzling. They were funny in ways that made me want to know how they had spent their decades. They didn’t try to sell themselves to me. They didn’t have to. And those that liked the way I looked were honest in their expression of that without being lecherous. It is good to know that there are roads ahead that are not so bad.</span><br />
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<span class="text_exposed_show">Oh, and I forgot to mention that these men do not text. They don’t know how. They don’t want to learn how. They don’t miss it.</span></div>
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Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-81154638887064751932014-01-01T12:21:00.001-05:002014-01-01T12:21:15.424-05:00My Predictions For 2014I nailed some biggies in my predictions for last year. We've got 365 days to see how I do this time around.<br />
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<a href="http://10thousandcouples.com/issue/january-2014/article/a-party-in-cleveland-beach-weddings-violence-in-africa-and-a-pope-in-danger-await-you-in-2014">Here is what I see.</a><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG7WeAA16wUtY830s4lC6_IbUe0hv42ufchtS-cEKE2gPD8ps69WJhKNHGwAPbkBxg2gX-EOsftOTG11ZjGTyURV4gFznXmAuEBpMf7lyV5qP3tfP7YHqFsv_r-icVmQKs4AnZ/s1600/Wizard+3+Marvel.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiG7WeAA16wUtY830s4lC6_IbUe0hv42ufchtS-cEKE2gPD8ps69WJhKNHGwAPbkBxg2gX-EOsftOTG11ZjGTyURV4gFznXmAuEBpMf7lyV5qP3tfP7YHqFsv_r-icVmQKs4AnZ/s400/Wizard+3+Marvel.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-20442861364405065992013-11-13T13:58:00.002-05:002013-11-13T13:58:39.586-05:00If you liked The Devil Wears Prada, you'll love INSIDE<span style="background-color: white; color: #404040; font-family: Roboto, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">My <a href="http://southfloridagaynews.com/articles/inside-charles-l-rosss-new-novel/134712">SFGN review</a> of INSIDE, a steamy new novel by Charles L. Ross. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8yZKBXWYr_en4d0ZmITu0PwUXV4qcHnWTOpF36gVP9l1BCoJhMBognQbE4D_LMn-pazOb5VbV1wjc-dIMIfB7jTp0Df4hKqpkvwbVIqJ0Cj6j46n5s-WKsT3OwUi49iqLx2tB/s1600/CLR2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8yZKBXWYr_en4d0ZmITu0PwUXV4qcHnWTOpF36gVP9l1BCoJhMBognQbE4D_LMn-pazOb5VbV1wjc-dIMIfB7jTp0Df4hKqpkvwbVIqJ0Cj6j46n5s-WKsT3OwUi49iqLx2tB/s320/CLR2.jpg" width="248" /></a></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYJr7fK30-zZJGssjxrAGLjIVJi4qW_fCLfM5aH-E6-GBrmiFvXXd9yIOtbrHXNT5GBsR_cF9F7YRCwrIFTv_u9WLIXjMGXzOOYzUVvxbHvZJZnX_Ed3tbKTNY806Sqb7oWa0i/s1600/Inside+front+cover2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgYJr7fK30-zZJGssjxrAGLjIVJi4qW_fCLfM5aH-E6-GBrmiFvXXd9yIOtbrHXNT5GBsR_cF9F7YRCwrIFTv_u9WLIXjMGXzOOYzUVvxbHvZJZnX_Ed3tbKTNY806Sqb7oWa0i/s320/Inside+front+cover2.jpg" width="219" /></a></div>
Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-27359246382816115332013-07-31T16:42:00.004-04:002013-07-31T16:42:35.580-04:00Should we judge Pope Francis?http://southfloridagaynews.com/articles/should-we-judge-pope-francis/126931<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #37404e; font-family: 'lucida grande', tahoma, verdana, arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px; text-align: left;">I hope you non-Catholics will find my reflections helpful. Catholics often presume that everyone understands the sin/confess/sin/confess wash cycle that is part of our tradition. I never thought about it until a classmate in Rome told me that is why he converted. He said Catholic boys got to do everything and then just go to confession once a week! Anyway: Here's <a href="http://southfloridagaynews.com/articles/should-we-judge-pope-francis/126931">what I said</a> about Pope Francis' recent comments.</span>Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-90859863205946194702013-07-30T10:29:00.000-04:002013-07-30T10:29:14.197-04:00Please support my SMARTRide<b style="background-color: white; border: 0px; font-family: Corbel, 'Lucida Grande', 'Lucida Sans Unicode', Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;"><a href="https://www.thesmartride.org/smart-ride-10/2580/" style="background-color: transparent; border: 0px; color: #8f5a18; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline;">https://www.thesmartride.org/smart-ride-10/2580/</a> </b><br />
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<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b>As a gay tour guide and travel writer, I have been on a bike more often this year than ever before in my 62 years. Unless the knees give out before November, I will be bicycling 165 miles from Miami to Key West to raise money to support HIV/AIDS organizations and initiatives. </b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b><br /></b></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b>This won't mean much without your support.</b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b>You know I'll be posting photos and writing about every juncture of the ride. Please consider cheering me on with <a href="https://www.thesmartride.org/smart-ride-10/2580/">your donation.</a> Thanks!</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b><br /></b></span></span>
<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b>Tony</b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Corbel, Lucida Grande, Lucida Sans Unicode, Arial, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 21px;"><b><br /></b></span></span>Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-28162203210126950552013-06-19T14:28:00.000-04:002013-06-19T14:28:17.747-04:00The new garden at CumberlindaIt's important to know what is in your dirt. Here, I wrestled with roots from the maples we just had removed and I am finding rocks and chunks of pavement from an old patio or path about eight inches below the lawn. There are submerged buckets of cement that had been used to support the metal pipes of a trellis/pergola the remains of which are stored in the rafters of the garage. I'm breaking my back doing this digging but I like it. Looking at the rest of the lot, I'm thinking of paying someone with a nice big machine to clear out the rest, but I can't bear the thought of becoming Ian McClellan in Gods and Monsters. Meanwhile, so as not to lose the season, plants (including the fig tree!) wait in pots on the deck, like patient immigrants on the planks off the boat at Ellis Island.<br />
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<br />Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8139328.post-91353380005851389472013-03-01T09:54:00.001-05:002013-03-01T09:54:54.007-05:00Let the conclave begin. My predictions.<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;">Just published is <a href="http://10thousandcouples.com/issue/march-2013/article/predicting-a-better-pope-for-women-and-gay-catholics">my prediction</a> for the papal election. My short list of 5 names, including info about which cardinals are gay and which ones would be good for women and gay Catholics. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; line-height: 18px;"><br /></span>Tony Adamshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10091330901996916966noreply@blogger.com1