OK. This is to the reader in the Pentagon who goes from here to Joe.My.God:
I am available as a consultant to your organization. I specialize in the design, installation and management of permanent and/or temporary shower room facilities for the military. Because I am patriotic, I offer this service for free and am willing to share lodging with my clients. Please e-mail me (email@example.com) for a brochure that includes my recently patented and popular soap dispenser which is wall-mounted just two inches above the shower room floor. Very ADA compliant.
Also, while Joe and I are glad to keep your Pentagonal workdays lively, we are not sure whether your attention will land us in the Lincoln bedroom or a federal pen.
(I know the Lincoln bedroom is not in the Pentagon, but maybe he's got connegshuns.)