Thursday, June 21, 2007

Martha Stewart, I'm available.

All those little scraps of paper that men leave behind. The ones that say "Call me next time you're in town". At home, you empty your pockets, and think to yourself "He was fun. Gonna save his number." Years go by. You never call the guy. One day you come across the scrap of paper and you can't recall the man who gave it to you. (This sometimes happens a week later.) You say to your partner. "Who's this? Luis? From Inwood?" Neither of you has any recollection. A year or two later you meet the guy again and none of you recalls the first meeting, but now you have two scraps of paper from the same guy...

I've never been able to toss these out. Instead, I save them in a box labeled "Ephemora", referring to either those scraps of paper or to their authors.

Several years back, I found a wooden footstool that someone had put out with the trash. I took off the old uphostery and stuffing, exposing the wooden frame work. I made a new cushion for it, refinished the feet and added some knobs. What to do about the bare sides?

Why not decoupage them with those little scraps of paper! I selected some of my favorites (truth to tell, we have enough to cover a fridge) and set to work with the appropriate paste easily acquired at any art supply store. Once the surface had dried, I protected it with two coats of urethane tinted slightly to diminish the impact of the information and also to pick up the color of the new upholstery.

Here is what experience teaches you: some ball point ink is fugitive, meaning that it will fade to invisible with exposure to sunlight. In order to preserve the writing on your decoupaged bits, apply a fixative UV light-repellant spray before you apply the urethane. These sprays are also easy to find in art supply stores. In our case, since some of the scraps are now blank, we will simply return to the Ephemora Box, select new ones, and apply a new layer over the old wherever needed.

PS: I've doctored the photo a bit to protect the guilty even if you click to magnify it, but I should think it a source of pride to find one's name among a pantheon of this nature, and to know that one's information now supports the honorable feet of our mothers when they visit.

9 comments:

circleinasquare said...

You are my hero.
:-)

E.

evilganome said...

Sex and arts and crafts. You are a true renaissance man. I shudder to think which landmark I could cover if I saved all the little slips of paper and matchbook covers from my 20's. Sadly, I am no longer a danger to the forests.

tornwordo said...

What a marvelous idea. I bet your home is riddled with conversation pieces.

BigAssBelle said...

tony! haha!! "a danger to the forests" . . . my days, too, of being a danger to the forests and the men of the world are long past. being a sedate matron of fif . . . fif . . . of a certain age, i do think with fondness of my popular teens and 20s and early 30s.

sadly, such an art project in the home of a straight woman would not be looked upon with favor by anyone at all. it is a tragedy, because my footstool-o-memories would be fabulous indeed.

David said...

You guys are something else.

Anonymous said...

That is EXCELLENT!

Anonymous said...

Pathetic. Finding my name on that thing would not be a source of pride... but then again that would not be possible in the first place. Sorry. Love a lot of your writing, but there are limits. =) signed, a fan.

Anonymous said...

Brilliant. I'm sure Ms Stewart would approve, heartily. And it's so 19th century/découpage as well.

Édouard de Sale bête

Daniel said...

Amazingly creative. I wish I could say the same, but I don't remember a single time I've scored a little paper like that - too shy and a little ugly, lol.