You will have to go to The Bilerico Project on Thursday at noon (I've been moved up two hours because they supposedly love me in California!) to see my response to the following:
Hey Fr. Tony,
HIV poz here and looking for a man to share my life. My on-line profiles say 32. Muscular. Gym built. VGL professional (yup, that does mean financially well-off) hung, drug-free, etc. etc. etc. All true except for the part where I say I am HIV NEGATIVE.
I know what you are going to say. No lies, no way, But I want to get to know a man not just fuck. I’m not going to infect anyone. I play safe. My viral load is undetectable and I am very careful about my meds and my health. I’m a better risk than all those druggies and boozer-losers.
I want to find a man I can get to know and love. I have to get my foot in the door. The man I want to meet will pass me by if I say I’m poz. He has already passed me by a hundred times.
For years I went to poz groups and met nobody who was boyfriend material so don’t tell me to do that.
I would never put anybody at risk with unsafe sex. I just want to date a guy for a good long time before I tell him my status. If it’s love, it ought to be strong enough to deal with the news, right? Or am I a shithead who deserves to be alone and assigned to the junkheap? You tell me. I’m just so tired of being alone. I am sick of getting my hopes up over some guy who disappears when I feel comfortable enough to tell him the truth.
Bad news Bear
Update: It's up! Go for it.