As we head into the award show season, there is discussion about the appropriateness of rented diamonds and designer gowns in a time of economic crisis.
This provides me with the opportunity to suggest a change for which I have long pined.
Would it be too much to ask that the stars arrive dressed in the signature costumes they wore in the films or plays that earned them their nominations?
Also, would it be too much to ask that the writers of those productions provide them with pithy but dazzling acceptance speeches? The unscripted gushing of all but a few winners is annoying.
These shows are supposedly delivering the best in entertainment, folks. I'm sure Reese Witherspoon is a nice lady, but wouldn't you really rather hear her say something supplied by Bruce Vilanch or Joan Rivers?
And don't get me started about the pain of listening to non-performers accepting awards.
I know this puts a burden on Meryl Streep this year, but she could change out of the habit in her limo en route to the after-party.
"Perge modo et qua te ducit via dirige gressum," said Venus to Aeneas.
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