Tuesday, September 18, 2007


Once a year for seventeen days we throw open the doors and welcome over a million visitors. We sell them carmelized popcorn, rumbleberry pie, fried dough with their choice of several sugary toppings, locally brewed beer, Italian ice cream, a giant baked potato stuffed with everything-and-chili, foot long hot dogs slathered with everything-and-sauerkraut, and much much more. And my building is but one small part of this huge fair. Every year as I watch America waddle through the building, the crowd seems to get fatter and hungrier. I am reminded of that program called "Scared Straight" in which young urban toughs get exposed to hardened lifers who show them what life in prison will be like if they don't mend their ways. The sight of my fellow citizens stuffing themselves and their obese children is sobering and frightening. I double my time on the tread mill and can barely swallow lettuce without guilt. One year we tried offering "Health Food". They wouldn't have it.
Tomorrow our state Miss will be here to greet the crowd. She'll probably be a little too thin, but being in this building, like being on TV, adds ten pounds.


Cooper said...

It is indeed sobering to see. With one in four children now overweight in this country, B.C. has recently mandated that all junk food and pop machines must be removed from schools in this province. In addition a minimum of 30 minutes of vigorous daily physical activity from K-12 must be part of every school curriculum.

My son's school has gone one step further. No junk food is permitted on the premises at all. He brought home a comprehensive list of suggestions/ideas for acceptable snacks and lunches on the first day. I was taken aback to find that some parents of my son's kindergarten classmates really resented this. Not surprisingly, those most vocal about it were overweight themselves.

BigAssBelle said...

somehow i envision all new yorkers as scrawny. guess not.

the general fattening of society is becoming alarming, i agree.

i have also doubled my days of cardio, working for that 500 calorie burn on the elliptical before i stop for the day.

it's scary, especially because i am capable of puffing up with such ease. if you want to see some really frightening stuff, watch this horror show on Discovery Health, something about Brookhaven Clinic there where y'all are. crimifuckinitly, that is some scary stuff, treating people so immense they can't walk.

circleinasquare said...

Is there funnel cake? I loves me funnel cakes!

evilganome said...

As another who has to watch their weight, things in Boston aren't much better. It is especially apparent when the suburbanites are in town for ballgames, etc.

While I am inclined to in part blame a lot of the widening of America on cheap prepared food, the lack of restraint among my fellow citizens is just appalling. The definition of a good meal is if it is overhanging the plate.

Every time I see these heifers, I go up on my weights at the gym and redouble my efforts on the cardio machines.

Anonymous said...

It's true that Americans are rightly famous around the world for being gluttonous and overweight (not that all overweight people are gluttonous, mind you). But I think we homos are pretty hard on ourselves and each other in this regard, and should be careful when we start talking about self-denial as a way of life. One of the great joys of life is eating... rich, creamy, delicious, calorific, yummy eating. The key, as in all things, is moderation and balance. If we just ask restaurants to provide us with reasonable portions, and if we just balance our occasional indulgences with a healthy (non-obsessive) exercise regimen, we'll all be happier, healthier, and more sane.

Life is hard and frustrating, especially in the BushCo era of fear and xenophobia. I for one plan to make extra efforts to show kindness and support toward myself and other homo and non-homo people alike, regardless of their body shape or size.

America's Dairyland
Madison, WI

dpaste said...


And for the record, Lynette, Tony is talking about Hartford, CT, not NYC. Not that we don't have our overweight citizens as well.