Thursday, June 04, 2009

Today on Bilerico: "What marriage has done to me"

You'll have to go to Bilerico later this morning to read my response to the following:

Dear Father Tony,

In all the talk about marriage equality, we hear about laws and rights and injustice, as well we should. But the video interview of George Takei and his husband made me wish I could hear more about the difference it's made to newly-married gay couples. What does it mean to you, now that you're married? As a long-committed newlywed, you are one whose opinion I'd like to hear, and other Bilerico contributors might chime in as well. This is the sort of message that straight people need to hear, to understand the reality of what heretofore may have been just an abstract idea. We need stories—pictures in our heads—to replace the old rhetoric.

I'm looking forward to your reply.

Bird O’Paradise

It's up. Get on it.


TedBear said...

Hi Fr. Tony. Your reply on "What marriage has done to me" is beautiful. We don't have the right to marry in Texas yet, but we will someday. I don't need marriage to validate my 24 year relationship, but I do want marriage. I want the equal treatment, legal protections and the maybe I do want a little validation. It is odd for me to type that here, I guess a part of me wants to say I am as good as them. Yeow. That is hard to read. I am out 100% with family, work (software industry), friends, neighbors, 100% out everywhere. Something inside me wants marriage, and I don't know what it is. I don't think marriage will change anything with my Overeducated Redneck husband. I want to wear a wedding ring and have it legally equal to hetero marriage. I am not sure I would want a ceremony at our church, mainly because I think I might sob all the way through it. Aw hell, I would sob if we got married at the County Clerk Office. Maybe just a wedding at our home and a party afterwards.

Tony Adams said...

I would add that I am glad we didn't spend a lot of money on how we did it. It took the whole thing out of the realm of what can be bought or sold.
Maybe we will have the party on our first anniversary.

TedBear said...

I know I wouldn't be a Groomzilla. That whole thing with the big church wedding looks so stressful. Also, no gifts. If people really feel compelled, they could donate to Lambda Legal. An ordinary party with all our favorite people would be the best gift of all.